I dragged myself out of my comfort zone for once. It was a little nerve wracking in the beginning, but it got easier. I feel I've hit it off with at least 2 or 3 women. I'll see by tomorrow or Monday who has matched with me
What was the experience like? What was the structure of the event like how was it organized during the actual speed dating event?
The host explained everything about it. Women stayed seated while the guys moved down in a line. I really liked that they had a whole page with ideas for icebreaker questions, as I've always struggled to go beyond the mundane ones. Each round lasted 6 minutes, and you move to your next table. All of those who you're interested in talking to some more will be given their contact info, same goes for the women. They made it sound so painless. There was one girl who was completely uninterested in the event, clearly in a rush since she kept pulling out her phone. Overall, I think it went well, and I'll see who likes me enough
Looks like I gotta permanently remove myself from the dating world. I got texted and was told 'no mutual matches'. 15 years of looking, and I'm so fed up right now
Sounds awful, like swiping on a dating app, except it's IRL. I suppose at least there's no catfishing. One book that might help you is How To Know a Person by David Brooks. I haven't read it, but I've listened to an interview with the author, and he seems to have some good ideas. The book isn't about dating per se but building connections, which is important in all types of relationships.
It's just best if I stop looking altogether. I just know all this stress would kill me one day. It's not worth it
Speed dating is good for practice. Like if you have zero experience dating it's a good thing to develop the conversational skill & put yourself into a mildly uncomfortable situation. I've tried it a few times in my early 20s, didn't lead to anything for me. Do not take speed dating seriously- be a little bit goofy & have a good time.
I've reached my absolute end. I'm not doing this shit anymore. My chest is still heavy, and I swear I must've been crying in my sleep from all the stress. To save whatever sanity I have left, I'm just going to forget all of this and live my life
Speed dating sounds like fun, but I would go into it with the attitude that I'm here for fun, not to find a date. Once I moved to a new town and was extremely lonely. I was desperate to meet a girlfriend and I didn't know anyone in this town. The best success I had during my loneliest period was when I gave up like you. At one point I said, I don't care about any of these women, I just want to have fun. Next thing I knew women started pursuing me. They couldn't figure out why I wasn't chasing them and it intrigued them. During that time I started dating 4-5 women at the same time, having sex with most of them, and only stopped when I met my wife. Stop caring so much, enjoy life, and the women will come to you.
I know you mean well, but hearing about you getting laid makes me feel worse. I get hit with FOMO way too easily. And I know my pain and hopelessness will still be visible for a while. It's a wound that's gone down to the bone and will take a very long time to heal. Problem is, I have no idea how I could possibly forgive myself and move on
Well, you are 35 years old. You can still have sex until you are like 70, or possibly later. So you have 35 more years to acquire a girlfriend
If it makes you feel any better, it was probably at least a year from the time I moved to the time I started finding meaningful women to date. It was a long dry spell, but I started focusing on enjoying life, and caring less about focusing on when I was going to get laid.
It's just hearing about people getting laid in general that makes me groan. It causes me to have instant feelings of being unwanted. It makes me say in my head "why not me?" Honestly, all these years of solitude has that question burned into my brain
there may be a reason we all suffer the way we do.. we are all unique and have unique things that bring us misery maybe you are supposed to learn something or gain some sort of knowledge. Perhaps once you attain what the knowledge of the reason for your suffering, then your suffering will begin to depart try and look past the day to day life we see each day!
My message is to forget about getting laid for now, and push the "why not me" from your mind. Instead say "What can I do today to have a great day." Once you start enjoying yourself the women will pick up on your positive vibe and you will find opportunities to get laid.
Yo man, I am new here, but from reading the thread I know your pain. I was doing online dating (I can tell you everything about each app, none of them are worth it). I have done speed dating, twice without any matches. And just couple hours ago I got rejected by a text that she can't be doing any dating, as she would prefer a friendship. Nearly 5 years of situations like this, nothing but rejections over a message, or even no message at all. Best thing I have found, work on yourself, hold yourself accountable, find people around that will support you, sometimes that can be found in the gym (The most famous place to after things like these), do what you love doing and find something to work towards.
I know everyone can sense my pain. I guess it's most of the reason why women avoid me. My two biggest demons (no relationship, no sex) invade my mind every single day, and I find it impossible to push them out. And I definitely know PMO makes it exponentially worse.
