What is this all for?

ForABetterLife20

ForABetterLife20

Fapstronaut
I'm having trouble getting motivation to not P or PMO. I haven't PMO'd in a long time, but for 95% of this streak, I've had something motivating me to not do it, most of that time being a girl. Saving myself for someone gave me a lot of motivation to not PMO or P.
And I got the equivalent of getting dumped last night, and I no longer have a healthy outlet for any sexual activity. Now, while I'm disappointed, I understand her reasons for not wanting to do anything. It's kind of an odd situation. We were right on the edge of having an actual relationship before she left. She left to go backpacking for almost 8 weeks in Alaska (which sounds sick!), and I had a really easy time not PMO'ing, because I would just think of her, and it'd be easy to not PMO or MO at all. If you saw my status, I'm home alone from now until late tomorrow night. She got back yesterday, so of course I was hoping she would have some time to come over, but instead she told me some stuff. She told me that while she didn't regret anything we did before she left, she felt like she grew a lot while she was out backpacking (of course she grew, out in nature for 7+ weeks with a lot of time to yourself, who wouldn't?). So, she wants to be friends, but no more "casual" things.
I hate this because it makes so much sense. I can totally understand her perspective, but my dick says "AW HALE NO SHE DIDN'T JUST DO THAT. WELL WHAT HAVE WE BEEN DOING THIS FOR?!?!"
So I've run into some trouble recently, and I'm wondering what to do. Kinda at a crossroads. What/Who am I doing this for? Myself? My future wife/family?
Oi. I really hope I don't sound like I'm complaining. I was/am freaking lucky to have such a good friend (who I've talked to about my plight against PMO actually).
Yeesh.
What do?
 
pornnomore18 said:
I'm having trouble getting motivation to not P or PMO. I haven't PMO'd in a long time, but for 95% of this streak, I've had something motivating me to not do it, most of that time being a girl. Saving myself for someone gave me a lot of motivation to not PMO or P.
And I got the equivalent of getting dumped last night, and I no longer have a healthy outlet for any sexual activity. Now, while I'm disappointed, I understand her reasons for not wanting to do anything. It's kind of an odd situation. We were right on the edge of having an actual relationship before she left. She left to go backpacking for almost 8 weeks in Alaska (which sounds sick!), and I had a really easy time not PMO'ing, because I would just think of her, and it'd be easy to not PMO or MO at all. If you saw my status, I'm home alone from now until late tomorrow night. She got back yesterday, so of course I was hoping she would have some time to come over, but instead she told me some stuff. She told me that while she didn't regret anything we did before she left, she felt like she grew a lot while she was out backpacking (of course she grew, out in nature for 7+ weeks with a lot of time to yourself, who wouldn't?). So, she wants to be friends, but no more "casual" things.
I hate this because it makes so much sense. I can totally understand her perspective, but my dick says "AW HALE NO SHE DIDN'T JUST DO THAT. WELL WHAT HAVE WE BEEN DOING THIS FOR?!?!"
So I've run into some trouble recently, and I'm wondering what to do. Kinda at a crossroads. What/Who am I doing this for? Myself? My future wife/family?
Oi. I really hope I don't sound like I'm complaining. I was/am freaking lucky to have such a good friend (who I've talked to about my plight against PMO actually).
Yeesh.
What do?
Click to expand...
I think you should do this whole nofap thing for yourself
i dont know what the reason was you started this journey but for me it was that i realized that my sexual preferences in porn movies are completely different then my real sexual preferences i was turned on by gay porn or sometimes from animals having sex some pretty fucked up shit and i didnt wanted this anymore because it destroyed me i dont do this for my friends my future wife or something like that i do this for me to live a better life regardless if i ever get a girlfriend

i just noticed doing stuff that changes your life just for girls never is good
People start going to the gym because they think they get a hot girlfriend
suddenly they have one and there motivation for the gym is slowly going away since they have a hot gf now
I also have a friend that always changes his life just to impress girls
say they dont like smoking so he stops smoking
say they dont like alcohol so he stops drinking it
say they like skinny jeans so he wears them
and afterwords he says it was stupid since it was her interests not his (also girls really dont like it)

i know this is something different another situation but i think you know what i mean

but maybe you could tell me why you wanted to do nofap so i maybe i understand your situation better
 
I do know what you mean. My situation started as doing it for myself. But when this happened with this girl, it was just easier to not PMO because it would have been against both of our best intentions. Now that its over, I guess I'm having trouble rekindling the original desire to stop PMO'ing
 
pornnomore18 said:
I do know what you mean. My situation started as doing it for myself. But when this happened with this girl, it was just easier to not PMO because it would have been against both of our best intentions. Now that its over, I guess I'm having trouble rekindling the original desire to stop PMO'ing
Click to expand...
Well i can understand this but i can tell you no relapse ever will be good i never ever felt good after relapsing like sure actually fapping again was insane i remember shaking hardcore and i was super exited but right after you orgasam you regret it you realize what you did that you destroyed your streak and you feel like shit this helps me to not relapse but maybe you didnt relapse as often as i did
i cant really give you a great tipp now i can just tell you remind yourself why you started and dont relapse
you can do this !

wish you good luck
 
Focus on other goals in life like getting a new better job or getting education or whatever it is. We all have plenty of goals; you can focus on whatever is important other than just having a girl.
 
Getting rid of negative energy in my life. I hope it works. I feel awful today.
 
I believe as many other have stated that you shouldn't do it for anyone other than yourself. Making a girl or anyone other than yourself the main basis of why you are doing this is counter productive because if that base vanishes everything you worked so hard on vanishes.

What it boils down to is if you WANT to do this or if you feel you NEED to do this only you can answer that. If you feel you need to stop pmo then that is motivation enough and a strong base to success.

Since people's wants change like the blowing wind at any given moment.

For me it was a need. I needed to do this if I was to change my life for the better.
 
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