Relapse is a choice

I am talking about my experiences, so i am not attacking someone. I want to take you out of the victim mentality.

But from all the posts that I have read and the people that I have met in rehab/12-step program etc., I came to see that relapse is a choice.

I am free of it now for a long time, but I know all of those bullshit excuses “only this time, than I am done”. I even did use it myself. I felt bad afterwards and made promises, like “I will never watch it again”, “this is the last time”. My mind just wanted to have a backdoor, to not fully give up.

Relapse will happen when you just begin with abstaining from PMO. You will learn from it, from failures. You learn what was your trigger, weak moments and become better by recognizing it. But relapsing so many times, every day/week is just a choice. You maybe still have pleasure in watching porn and don’t want to give up?

Most of the time, people have just bullshit excuses why they relapsed. They have excuses to have a backdoor (not blocking porn or scrolling social media), for when they have urges, so they can relapse.

Let’s put it this way: Nobody pulled a gun to your head, that you have or had to watch those porn images and/or videos.

If someone promised to give you a million and all you have to do is stay way from porn or fully PMO for 1 year or even 5 years. Believe me, you would stay clean. You wouldn’t relapse. Because it becomes a priority. You will do everything for achieving that. You will go through the hard times, the hardest urges. No matter what.
If there is a will, there is a way..

Or am I wrong?

So, what are you gonna do to stay clean next time?

What actions will you take?
It's your responsibility.