You can’t really help what happens in your sleep. You controlled the thoughts and went to sleep. Even Buddhist monks, if they have a wet dream, doesn’t break their vow of celibacy. I don’t think I need to be stricter than a Buddhist monk.
83 days done. Lots of anger and frustration today, made it through without causing any major damage, but it was a rough day. Got one more day, though, and I’m gonna another one as long as I do the next right thing.
Day 5/90 almost 290 days on this forum,and my highest streak was 32 days.That time was the happiest part of my life,i had clear brain ,my mind used to be on its full potential and i used to be satisfied every morning.Then that era of relapses came which rendered my helpless and hapless.The life in relapses is a hellish one,no satisfaction,no jovail and no confidence at all.Relapses are the worst enemies in this journey.I cant take my self for granted.This time in the shadows of fellow fighters i will be trying to use my every possible means to get rid of this ominous
Day 0 again after so much struggle I tried my best but due to the loneliness these -ve thoughts came to my mind & I relapse which is the saddest part. I want to get out of this no matter what. I know it's going to be very difficult for me but I'll achieve 90 days streak. ❤
Day 5. The day I've failed at four times in a row. I won't fail this time. For each time I've relapse after a long streak the more tired I get and the longer it takes to recover. First I had my energy back relatively quickly, then it took one more day, then it took two more days ... and so forth. This time I don't have as strong urges as 5-6 days ago. This could of course be that my mind got simple got tired of it. Too much stimulation. But it can also mean that over time we have stored energy within us that gets drained after a relapse - especially edging PMO. It hurts the brain. I'm more than sure that is the case. So when you know this, a wet dream or a relapse isn't as damaging as you may think after, let say day 35. The only problem is when the mind comes in the way thinking "well now I've ejaculated so I should do it again", and that's where it goes downhill again.
I can add this theory that I have. I don't know if it's accurate but I've been thinking like this: Generally energy seems to return every 7th day for the average man (could be 4 or up to 30+ days if you're much older like in your 60's). So in theory let say you're on day 42 and have a wet dream or ejaculate quickly without P-stimulation, only MO. (-7 Days of energy lost). You're on Day 0 again but you still have energy stored from previous 35 days (or at least 12 days or so if you're older: -30 days). That's how I see it. But if you ejaculate again it's minus 7 more days, then you have 28 days of stored energy left, (or maybe it's double the damage if it happens shortly after the first ejaculation.. then you would hypothetically have 21 days of energy left in your storage). But I think the energy could get stuck if you only sit down all day. Your body needs movement to get the energy flowing. Too much inactivity and energy blockages in (for example) the lower back/kidneys could lead to a leakage of your life energy.. and your stored energy could be drained over time, dispite being on ~day 28. But blockages can be released with certain exercises so that the energy can flow freely again. The reason you sometimes can feel energized after ejaculation is because it temporarily opens the energy canals. It can last for ~a day but because of the energy drainage (semen nutrients and its life essence) a "hangover effect" comes the following day(s) where you feel a void, feel very low or even sick.. until you're recovered and are back to normal. Long term damage/drainage will take much longer to heal and may require exercises to heal /or to/ open upp the blockages. This should be somewhat true because according to Taoism which is 5000+ year old knowledge; ejaculating once every 7th day or so (depending on your age/rythm) is not hurtful but you will not be able to build up your energy levels. Life Energy will stay on the same levels if you follow your natural rythm and ejaculate only once each time. I think this make a lot of sense because I've experience it. And that lead me to the final questions: Why the hell do we fail when we can become winners just within days!?.. when we can reach the higher plains of life in just 1 to 3 months!?.. and we will feel much better in every possible way!?.. why do we choose to have lower energy levels? It doesn't make any sense... With the drainage of energy and the dirtiness of a P-polluted mind, the mind has trouble seeing the light within itself because it hasn't cleaned the muddy window enough to see its true self. We can change that any time we want to. How about Now!? JUST DO IT! It's the Challenges that we overcome that makes us Stronger. I'd rather live just One More Day where I Do what I know to be Right than living a lifetime in failure.