Day 88 28 days without a drink. I had a strange compelling urge to shoot my load all day yesterday but thankfully didn't though it was very close. The same thing happens to me when I am on a fitness drive or abstaining. I could be on a fitness regime eating all the right foods than our of nowhere I feel the urge to binge on junk food. This happens even when I have lots of good food in the house and I have to go out and get the junk food. I just seem to have a destructive urge to undo all the good work I have done at the final hurdle.What the root of it all is I have no idea, but I would love to find out.
Hey, i think it is common and natural in a way. It is like when you go for long run. The last 1km sometimes is mentally unbearable. Keep the fight up man, it is a damn mental only thing!
I hate myself I really do , I got hard on's and I let them pass but they build up actually the urge which cuse me a relapsed today , I was about to go on day 2 but I failed miserably . but nothing can be done soooo 0/90 I WILL COME STRONGER THIS TIME
Day 6 I used to be there too man! I believe there IS a healthy balance between having healthy sexual relationship and not overdoing it. I used to think that you should be able to have sex many times per day and that is a sign of sexual health, but no normal man can keep up with this for long - maybe a few days but thats about it. I have also felt a complete flatline when I first started doing NoFap. We have conditioned our brains to think that everything valuable is sex and by looking at people have sex many times a day we start believing this is the new normal. It is not, and on top of that you start running in those sexual issues after being addicted for some time, and now you can't do that multiple times a day easily, which depresses you and you start squeezing harder so you can orgasm and the spiral goes on ... After cutting this off with a relapse here or there for over a year. I can say that you gradually condition your brain back to normal sexual behaviors. I currently enjoy sex very much, but I don't need to have it constantly or even every day. As long as you stick to being clean MOST of the time you will be good! but when I say CLEAN I mean NOT Masturbating. PORN IS COMPLETELY OFF THE TABLE You have to remove that completely. Masturbation - if it's rare - it's fine. If that is your main source of sexual pleasure - then the brain will start thinking this is it again and you may have problems with actual sex. But yes there is a healthy balance and it takes time to get there but you guys will! I wish you all strength! I am on my way for another full 90 days.
5/90 I was away after a week-long solo vacation. I am back now with a vengeance. I am going to kick the shit out of PMO and give it the final knock-out punch.
Day 90. Thanks for all your support everyone. I feel like I learned a lot through this challenge. I believe, like any drug, the PMO cycle reinforces itself over time. The more you immerse yourself in porn, the more your brain will find a way to rationalize the next binge. The good news is abstaining from it can help your view readjust as its addictive effects lessen with time. I wanted to share a tactic I learned from people who have given up alcohol (I haven't had a drink in about 10 months now.) It's called "playing the tape forward". You see, at this point, you must be quite aware of the pattern which will play out when you PMO. I mean it's not a mystery anymore is it? After the dopamine rush, the temporary thrill and escape, you will end up on the downhill side of the experience feeling regret, shame, exhaustion, anxiety, etc. So a way to stop yourself acting out is just to imagine those feelings, that you know will happen, and use that to convince yourself that "it's just not worth it" to reinforce that cycle once again. It will only bring more negative outcomes in your life. Deep down you know this, but what helps is to stop in that moment and feel it, really feel the remorse, the frustration, the hopelessness that you know will be there after yet another PMO binge. The longer you abstain from the cycle, the more power you gain over it. You can see it from a higher level, rather than existing helplessly within it. You can gain a perspective that sees the whole process, and can avoid it altogether. Temptations may still arise from time to time, but you realize you do have a choice, you don't have to act out, you don't have to feel the pain of worsening addiction. You can have a future which is healthier, more fulfilling. You can regain your own self-respect and control over your life. You can be free. Best wishes to all. Don't give up, you can do it, and it's worth it.
