35 and older accountability, Group 2

Thanks buddy!! Appreciated! Though perhaps not “years” ;-)

 

Legend!

 

Just some notes for the week. I usually make this post on Sunday but I had to work all day. I stand almost 2-1/2 years into recovery. I had this notion that when I joined this site it would be my quick cure and everything would instantly get better. That did not happen and it was a unrealistic thing to think. In fact, some things have got worse since I started on here but it was because the ball was already rolling downhill. I do feel things leveling out and I believe I am heading the right direction.

My ecommerce business has been on a steady slide for years. A lot of it was due to my habits but also a lot due to the events and the economy of the last few years. I feel we are getting things lined out and building it back right now.

I started a part time "gig economy" doing deliveries about the time I came on here. I am still doing that and it is working out good. I am making good extra income and I like getting out of the house a bit.

I also started another part time job in November. I get to work on average 1-2 days a week at that. It is going well.

My ultimate goal is to rebuild our business right and phase out of these other things.

I write all of the above to say that for me recovery takes time and it is more than just quitting PMO. It has been exploring the reasons that got me into in and kept me there. Those things had to be explored and corrected. I still work on some of those things to this day. It is about rebuilding all that PMO messed up. I've found that the longer you stay in it, the more damage it does and the more it destroys. Now it is about finding the life I truly want to live and moving into it. This is the part I am putting the most effort into. It takes time. Have a great day everyone!

 

HECK YES!!! Tell us about the top 3 changes you made to your thinking, habits and what you feel others need to know to succeed like you did.

 

Hi persona2903! Thanks for asking!
I just broke my 12-d streak 30 minutes ago...But I cut all contact w/ the woman I was cheating.

 

Hi guys! I've been strugling for 2 years in NF-journey....Today I broke a 12-d streak...But then I just added more some blockades to postpone fapping...Lets go!Hi everyone, I've been struggling on my NoFap journey for two years. Today I relapsed after a 12-day streak, but I added more blockers to prevent future relapses. Let's keep going!

 

Deepening inner work, dedication to morning silence increases the peace through the day.

 

I'm sorry I haven't been active here. I was doing well, but then I slipped. One day at a time again.

 

Hi was just wondering have you been celibate for a year?

 

Involuntary yes. My wife seems no longer interested… and I no longer play with it.

 

Is this how you see your future? I mean obviously porn is evil I believe that but I don't necessarily think all sex is bad... Do you think sex could start negative behaviours again?

 

Hello Everyone,

I'm sorry for not posting here. I haven't been on the forums in a while. And I haven't done well at all since the very end of February. I did well before that for about 60 days. I think it was very well during that time.

The last few days have been good. I'm trying to stay on track and get it together.

 

I don’t think sex is bad - I’d really like to my wife to be more interested. But I’d prefer to have adopt a Karezza style to it in future. Having given up playing with it, and only had involuntary ejaculations for the past 13 months I’m so much happier that way. Never expected to buy into the semen retention approach but this lifestyle seems to be working well for me.

 

It’s good to have you back

 

Nice one bro, well done, also I'd not heard of Karezza before but I really like the thinking, it's like anti porn sex, how it should be, good luck with that!

 

I really appreciate you being here with me. I admire how you work so hard for your family and how you are willing to put in the hard work.

I wanted to check in on how you're doing. You're the glue that keeps us together. I know you've been struggling and haven't been here since end of March, but we're here and ready when you're ready.

A 12-day streak is a really important achievement. The truth of all of our streaks that we often forget is once we have done them, the ability to do them again, it always remains in us.

Get back to what worked and the good things you've done in the past. Each thing we learn and have success with becomes a tool that we can pull out, a little personal navigator to guide us back to the path, when we lose our sense of direction.

You are a continual inspiration to this forum. There are few of us who have shown anywhere near the level of strength and commitment that you have. Thank you for making that change and staying here to continue to be a positive model for us.

 

Eating one meal per day, walking the dog in meditation and enjoying nature.
Me and my partner are meditating together 3 times per week now in morning.
We listen to guided meditations, helps us in our relating also.
I dedicated once a week to going over our relationship on what is going well and what would make our life more wonderful.

There is no desire for sex and we are not sexually active regularly but our relationship is very deep,
its an interesting dynamic as I used to think relationship is all about good sex, but our spiritual realization of our true nature
has liberated us to some measure from identification with the body and the desires of it.

Its so much more freeing.

 

Hi guys, I know it's not that much of a big deal but this length of time for me is insane (after years and years of twice a day), I have sailed close to the wind with some of my surfing but I restrain myself and don't get sucked in, self censor etc, I'm not sure how this has happened but I'm just going with it, I did have some therapy recently to help me deal with the problem and I think that told my subconscious that if I don't quit soon I will waste my whole life over this drug, I'm better than that, I'm stronger than that!
Keep up the good work!