5th Graders Should be Taught about Porn Addiction

[Deleted Account]

First off, my childhood was mostly great and I was pretty much always in a happy mood. Social anxiety was always present but despite that, I was pretty likable, funny and overall a cool kid. I think 1st or 2nd grade was when I first heard of the term "say no to drugs" and we learned that cigarettes and alcohol (along with other drugs) are addictive. Now, addiction may be a complicated topic, especially to a little kid so elementary schools made it simple by "just saying no to drugs" and not succumbing to the peer pressure, not trying to fit in, not trying to be or "look cool" etc. Still, I eventually got into a bit of a drinking problem a lot later in life at 23 years old. The D.A.R.E. campaign and "just say no" slogan isn't a rescue as some kids will still get into drugs despite of it but at least kids were aware of how addictive it can be/get.

5th grade is when I started learning about puberty in school--perfect time to bring up PMO addiction... but they never brought that topic up, although they should've in my opinion. Boys would be separated from the girls for about 2 weeks or so to learn about puberty and at the end, we would be put together in the same class for a more general coverage on puberty. 6th grade was when my relationship to porn became addictive because that was around the time I started PMOing to it often and PMO was the thing that became addictive to me. I eventually was no longer the likable kid I once was because I didn't handle puberty well or my boosted social anxiety and my relationship to porn. Puberty can hit kids hard especially in the acne department and I had pretty bad acne. So there wasn't that much I could've done about that. But my relationship with PMO, there's something that could've been done about that. In the 5th grade, if I would've received the same awareness of how addictive PMO could be the same way I received the awareness of how addictive cigarettes and alcohol can be, then I probably would've slowed my horses down on the PMO.

If elementary schools can cover topics on drug addiction, weapons, puberty, wet dreams etc. then sure enough, PMO addiction can also be talked about. I did have a sex ed class in 6th grade but by then I was pretty much hooked to PMO, and regardless, PMO was still not brought up in sex ed class either. The awareness of PMO addiction should be mentioned as early as 5th grade.

 

[Overforme]

I would absolutely agree. And they should have former users go and talk to them and explain the dangers in detail.

 

[pancakebaker99]

I agree I remember in the 5th grade I knew some kids that I felt would be mature enough to handle that topic. Only mentioning that since kids are kids being immature is their nature. 5th grade was also my first time learning about puberty similar to your experience they separated the boys from girls and the gym coach explained things to us some kids giggled but others took it seriously.

 

[Deleted Account]

Porn addiction is not recognized as an addiction by the mental health professional community at large. So this will fall to parents at home, the same way conversations about actual consent and sexual health fall to parents at home. I teach sex education in high school when it's my turn (a few people in the building have the cert) and by far most districts in the area approve a curriculum focused on pregnancy and STDs and "values and taking responsibility for your actions" (which is always code for pro-life language). Our curriculum teaches masturbation as healthy and normal, but mentions literally nothing about masturbation aids and their damage (porn, over-using vibrators, etc). Parents would burn me at the stake for even whispering those words to their 17 year olds.
But my elementary schooler was exposed to an extreme pornographic video by some second grader on the school bus holding his cell phone up with a very violent video playing. Came home crying because the woman in the video was being very hurt and he didn't know how we could help her. Of course our district refuses to do anything about cell phones in school for any grade level, but discuss the dangers or ethics of exactly that video that a bus FULL of k-4th graders saw and I would definitely be fired.

 

[Deleted Account]

Porn addiction is not recognized as an addiction by the mental health professional community at large. So this will fall to parents at home, the same way conversations about actual consent and sexual health fall to parents at home. I teach sex education in high school when it's my turn (a few people in the building have the cert) and by far most districts in the area approve a curriculum focused on pregnancy and STDs and "values and taking responsibility for your actions" (which is always code for pro-life language). Our curriculum teaches masturbation as healthy and normal, but mentions literally nothing about masturbation aids and their damage (porn, over-using vibrators, etc). Parents would burn me at the stake for even whispering those words to their 17 year olds.
But my elementary schooler was exposed to an extreme pornographic video by some second grader on the school bus holding his cell phone up with a very violent video playing. Came home crying because the woman in the video was being very hurt and he didn't know how we could help her. Of course our district refuses to do anything about cell phones in school for any grade level, but discuss the dangers or ethics of exactly that video that a bus FULL of k-4th graders saw and I would definitely be fired.

Great real life information here. Thank you. Such an interesting and broad topic (sex ed--and specifically porn addiction/masturbation aids etc.). We should probably do better with this subject but it doesn't seem so easy for the reasons you mentioned.

 

[Deleted Account]

Porn addiction is not recognized as an addiction by the mental health professional community at large. So this will fall to parents at home, the same way conversations about actual consent and sexual health fall to parents at home. I teach sex education in high school when it's my turn (a few people in the building have the cert) and by far most districts in the area approve a curriculum focused on pregnancy and STDs and "values and taking responsibility for your actions" (which is always code for pro-life language). Our curriculum teaches masturbation as healthy and normal, but mentions literally nothing about masturbation aids and their damage (porn, over-using vibrators, etc). Parents would burn me at the stake for even whispering those words to their 17 year olds.
But my elementary schooler was exposed to an extreme pornographic video by some second grader on the school bus holding his cell phone up with a very violent video playing. Came home crying because the woman in the video was being very hurt and he didn't know how we could help her. Of course our district refuses to do anything about cell phones in school for any grade level, but discuss the dangers or ethics of exactly that video that a bus FULL of k-4th graders saw and I would definitely be fired.

I'd like for more people/parents to see comments like these especially coming from a certified teacher of sex education like you that, if allowed, can provide some education and/or awareness to the sex-ed subtopic of masturbation aides. Many parents aren't talking to their kids about it, don't know how to or would rather not say anything. Teachers and curriculums would know how to though if we were to allow it. Maybe if more and more people were to visit urologists for masturbation aide-induced sexual dysfunction or therapists for porn addiction issues, perhaps over time, I wonder if it can be recognized by the mental health professional community at large.

 

[IGY]

5th grade

What age does that correspond to? I think different countries have different grade structures.

 

[Deleted Account]

What age does that correspond to? I think different countries have different grade structures.

10 - 11 years old in the United States.

 

[IGY]

10 - 11 years old in the United States.

Thank you. We had sex education when we were 12-13 years old in the UK. It was dealt with in biology class with girls and boys taught together. It was anatomical. There was nothing about consent, relationships or addictions. Pretty poor! Based on when many kids are first exposed to pornography, I think sex education should begin at ages 8-9. There's no use closing the stable door after the horse has bolted.

Furthermore, we shouldn't lose sight of the responsibility parents have to give sex education to their children. It is really negligent for them to abdicate this responsibility for the school to deal with. Why are parents so hung up about sex. Basically, my father couldn't even say the words sex, intercourse, masturbation, penis or vagina etc.

 

[Deleted Account]

Thank you. We had sex education when we were 12-13 years old in the UK. It was dealt with in biology class with girls and boys taught together. It was anatomical. There was nothing about consent, relationships or addictions. Pretty poor! Based on when many kids are first exposed to pornography, I think sex education should begin at ages 8-9. There's no use closing the stable door after the horse has bolted.

Furthermore, we shouldn't lose sight of the responsibility parents have to give sex education to their children. It is really negligent for them to abdicate this responsibility for the school to deal with. Why are parents so hung up about sex. Basically, my father couldn't even say the words sex, intercourse, masturbation, penis or vagina etc.

Yes. Same here! My father couldn't do it either. It may be an awkward conversation to have but one that ought to be had.

 

[IGY]

Yes. Same here! My father couldn't do it either. It may be an awkward conversation to have but one that ought to be had.

Yes. Fortunately, my mum was fantastic and gave me and my brothers sex education. But I honestly don't think she knew that porn was a potential addiction. If she did, there is no way she would have withheld that warning. Bless my mum.

 

[Deleted Account]

But I honestly don't think she knew that porn was a potential addiction. If she did, there is no way she would have withheld that warning. Bless my mum.

I doubt my parents knew either.

 

[RobbyGo36]

I think it would be a great idea, and I don't think we should give over the conversation to prudish people who would try to control the conversation around sex education by limiting it to discussions about reproductive health. The fact is there are an alarming amount of psychological issues attached to sexual activity, and kids should be made aware of them at the level they can understand at that age.

It's not helpful for to leave kids in an ignorant state at these ages. When I was a kid in the '80s and '90s,

 

[learning]

Seems like a good idea. I remember a lecture in 6th grade that discussed the dangers of smoking and recreational drugs.

 

[Deleted Account]

I forget where I read it but it’s been said the D.A.R.E. program was a failure and that the schools that did have it also had a higher percentage of kids grow up into adults with substance abuse problems. Some speculate this was because police gave the message rather than rehabilitated drug addicts, which might have made a difference but I’m not sure it would have made a huge one. I know the program didn’t keep me away from drugs nor did the talks with my parents.

Either way, I don’t see a program like this solving any problems when it comes to porn and preventing future porn addiction.

 

[Deleted Account]

I know the program didn’t keep me away from drugs nor did the talks with my parents.

For me, it actually did. It kept me away from cigarettes especially (let alone actual drugs of course). Alcohol is a lot more socially acceptable. So it didn't quite keep me away from that but for a long time, it did (in terms of alcoholism I mean). For me, the D.A.R.E. program was a success. So, I respectfully disagree.

 

[Deleted Account]

For me, it actually did. It kept me away from cigarettes especially (let alone actual drugs of course). Alcohol is a lot more socially acceptable. So it didn't quite keep me away from that but for a long time, it did. For me, the D.A.R.E. program was a success. So, I respectfully disagree.

As you admitted yourself the D.A.R.E. didn’t keep you from alcohol in the end, due to other factors such as it being more acceptable in society. What I think you’re failing to acknowledge is that porn is not the same as drugs, so to say the same programs for drug prevention would have been effective for porn prevention is a huge leap.

The problem with porn is that it deals with sex and sex is a topic in which not all of society agrees on how to navigate it. Some take a very self-control approach while others think the solutions is to simply try to mitigate the consequences of human weakness. Others think calling something bad, even porn, is unhealthy and puritanical.

In short your “solution” isn’t one since it couldn’t be implemented effectively within a society that isn’t unified on the subject. It’s going to be even harder in a society that is slowly rebelling against conformity to even physical reality.

 

[EscapingPMO]

I agree that schools should help prevent kids from watching porn. However, I think there needs to be a really careful and calculated way of presenting the material.

For example, when they taught us as kids to not do drugs or drink alcohol, a lot of the students thought the teachers were really lame and not cool. We also usually didn't like going to school that much and we didn't think the presentations were fun, more like a way of trying to control us.

So then when we got older, even as early as age 13-14, a lot of students starting drinking alcohol and smoking weed, and even doing some sexual stuff. Once high school started, even more students were drinking, smoking, and having sex.

So in reality, this plan could also backfire. Students might want to rebel against the teachers and watch porn and have as much sex as possible since they don't like the teachers.

So I don't think it would be as simple as teaching the kids in 5th grade. Will they really retain the information? Will they really implement it in their own lives?

I think the main responsibility should fall on the parents/caregivers of the children. This is where the failure has happened... our parents didn't teach about the dangers of sexuality properly. Most probably just didn't understand the gravity of the situation

 

[thedev]

OR A MUCH SIMPLER IDEA: Just fuckin ban people from being able to showcase themselves copulating on camera for billions to watch...? Your idea doesn't target the problem at its source and is, therefore, lackluster.

 

[Deleted Account]

Porn ban will never happen. It will go the way of prohibition.
I think an excellent start would just be getting phones out of schools. Sets an example to parents of what society expects (that maybe your fifth grader doesn't need a phone) and it's very overestimated how much teachers can supervise their phone use in school. We can't even make them put them away for instruction and work time, but elementary parents definitely think we're supervising to make sure there is no bullying or undesirable behavior happening on the screens.

It's especially an issue in special Ed. Covid sent kids home where they found more free time and porn. Lots of the special Ed population did not adjust well to coming back and the social expectation that they are not watching porn in public. I had a student last year when I was a special Ed/math intervention push-in masturbate under the table where we were working. I have found human secretions in various parts of the room to the extent that I had to trade work tables/letting them sit back in the lab benches so they could plug in their Chromebooks for individual desks without skirts and extension cords.

My policy is I never ever ever look at student phone screens or take possession of phones at all. Too dangerous because they send pictures to each other and there is no protection for me if I happen to see a student photo or am holding a device with pictures of minors.