Are hookers bad for my recovery?

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by strongwarrior17, Sep 4, 2023.

  1. strongwarrior17

    strongwarrior17 Fapstronaut

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    Hello guys!

    I have struggled with porn addiction for more than a decade now, I am 25. I've been aware this addiction has been destroying my life since 2017 or so when I had a chronic depression episode caused by this evil, and I've been trying to recover.

    I have done tons of research worth a PHD if you ask me, I actually did a minor in psy trying to understand my mind's behavior. But something I haven't tried enough is group therapy, and I know it plays a huge role in recovery, so here I am.

    My best attempt for a 90-day NOFAP was 57 days and that was a couple of years ago. Now I am on a streak of 35 days, but this time I added a reward that every 18 days I will have sex with a hooker if I didn't get laid on my own merits. the two-month mark I find the hardest, well, I'd say based on the research I have done, and also my own experience since I can't pass this milestone.

    Idk if this reward program I doing will help achieve my 90-day goal and I was hoping you guys who have done it successfully could tell me some tips, or am I just setting myself to fail?

    I have had strong temptations, but this keeps in check since I know if I am strong enough for this period of time I will be highly rewarded

    Thank you guys! I can't wait to hear from you, I wish you luck to your own journeys.
     
  2. SuperiorMan95

    SuperiorMan95 Fapstronaut

    I'm sure plenty of guys here would tell u its bad but I think hookers have their place. You are a unique individual with his own dynamic, maybe a hooker is a great idea for you. Hopefullu you're not hiring her to do some crazy sh*t to u but otherwise F it. When I was in Thailand a few years ago, a good ol' rub n tug was a good outlet when I was going through a dry spell. I find that it kept me more focused than just going crazy thinking about jerkin it. I personally dont do it cuz I cant afford to but if I could, I would do it once a month or something during dry spells.
     
  3. strongwarrior17

    strongwarrior17 Fapstronaut

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    Thanks man, I do think it helps to handle all the accumulated sexual energy NOFAP causes.
     
  4. Icewarrior

    Icewarrior Fapstronaut

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    What place do hookers have in a strong warrior’s life? And if you use the hooker is that helping her or damaging her?
     
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  5. WinstonVek

    WinstonVek Fapstronaut

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    If you have a history with Hookers/Escorts that is linked to your PMO addicton, I would say it's not a good idea, because both is basically wired together, so visitting one could potentially lead to re- activating the same pathways you try to wither by abstaining and thus pushing you back, or at least putting you on hold in your recovery journey.


    I think everyone who has been on a longer streak knows how tough things can get and in the age of social media, dating apps and certain political/idelogical agendas odds are really not in favor of of the average man, so I understand that it's even more tempting to give it a try...

    It's just my point of view, but I don't see any pros worth it to do it, especially as an PMO addict.

    - It strengths the view of an PMO addict- objectifying women
    - Just like P, the whole experience is an illusion and you pay for it
    - There is no emotional bond, likely not even sympathy, at least you will never be able to tell, worst case she's even disgusted by you
    - She's doing it all day with other men and perhaps has done it for years
    - Even if it's legal in your country It's still a shady business and you never know the history of her, 99% of them are forced or pushed unwillingly into that business and can't let it behind that easily
    - In a sense it's cheating, like by getting rid of PMO we are forced to go out and seek a partner, but instead this is just another substitute that can lead to another addiction if you are not careful
    - You basically admit you are a slave to your instinct/drive

    Also think of how much time it took you to get to where you at right now.
    36 whole days, that's a long time if you think of it and as a reward you want to throw that process away for a few minutes of pleasure?
    Imagine instead of having a mindset of being deprived of something, you would think of it as being rewarded.
    Idk about you, but usually a streak of 3/4 weeks gives me more energy, motivation and drive.
    Key word is sexual- transmutation
     
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  6. mentorr

    mentorr Fapstronaut

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    My question to you is: what exactly are you rewarding? Why do you need to “get off” at some point? Why not just sit in the temptation and find out what is waiting behind it?

    Recovery itself IS the reward. Deep down I think you already know this.
     
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  7. Meshuga

    Meshuga Fapstronaut

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    Yes.

    Sex is for procreation and pair bonding. Porn and hookers both are a misuse of sex. Both will be detrimental. Of course if you don’t buy into that premise, this opinion is irrelevant. But I’ve seen enough guys independently discover seeing prostitutes is part of the addiction, and they are a massive waste of money, to offer that recommendation anyway.

    Addicts gonna addict, though. If you want to see hookers, you’ll shut your ears to good sense and listen to that one guy who says it’s cool. That’s the way it always works.
     
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  8. JJackson

    JJackson Fapstronaut

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    Porn addiction is just a branch on the tree of sex addiction. You're just feeding those same neural pathways. It's like an alcoholic who drank like 5 beers a day and now rewards himself with a few shots every 18 days. You're still engaging in your addiction. Do some research on neuroplasticity if you wanna learn more. But also it all depends on what you actually want from getting clean. What do you feel is wrong with your porn use? Why are you trying to get rid of it?
     
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