Flatline depression please help

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Nismos14, May 11, 2019.

  1. Nismos14

    Nismos14 Fapstronaut

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    Hey guys, I've been in a major flatline for the past month and over the last week or so it's really starting to get me down.

    My johnson is completely dead, shrivled and unresponsive, which I know its all part of the process but how long is this going to last? I've been in flatline (I think) for nearly 6 weeks at this point and I Almost relapsed this morning which is why I'm making this post.


    I've been doing up to 2 hours intense exercise every day and eating healthy, I'm a tad overweight and have started to drop some weight which was keeping me happy enough until about a week ago I lost all motivation, I literally have to force my self out of bed and force myself to work out and afterwards I still feel like crap. Nothings making me happy, I just want to lay in bed and cry, but I can't even cry. I have no emotions. just numb and depressed. I can't stay in this flatline forever. My partner is totally supporting me but her needs for intimacy are rising and I just have no motivation to even touch her which makes her feel shit.

    I'm still exercising and watching my calorie intake and I hope to drop 15-20 pounds as well as get my erections and libido back but I feel like my brain is in a massive withdrawal for junk food, porn and gratification. I just don't know what to do.

    Please, is there anything else I can do to boost my mood?

    Guys who have come out of a long flatline, how did you cope with the worst of it? I hate this shit I just want to give up but I'll ****ing hate myself if I mess this up AGAIN and be back to square one.

    Thanks for reading guys.. Really struggling here.
     
  2. Tiger uppercut!

    Tiger uppercut! Moderator Assistant
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    I was in your exact spot not that long ago. It was brutal, man. Horrible. I feel ya.

    It just slowly started fading away though. Everyone is different but I’d say you’re just about there. Give it a little bit more time. Don’t be a dummy like me and relapse ;)
     
  3. Nismos14

    Nismos14 Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for your reply man, I hope I'll start to come out of this hole soon, I can't even think straight. I have to force myself to do anything right now and get no satisfaction/ mental reward afterwards..
     
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  4. Tiger uppercut!

    Tiger uppercut! Moderator Assistant
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    I know. I had no words to describe it to my wife. It was a dark time. I never want to go back there. I don’t think there is any magic activity that will pull you out of it...but they can make it bearable. If you’ve made it this far you are more than tough enough to get to the finish line. Onwards we go! ;)
     
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  5. Nismos14

    Nismos14 Fapstronaut

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    Thanks man, I'll keep on fighting.
     
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  6. Pedro.lives

    Pedro.lives Fapstronaut

    Hey buddy!

    First off you need to stop overthinking and meditate. Also maybe go check your test levels with doctor? I do penis exercises in the shower as well as take testosterone and I’m horny as hell all the time with an above average size penis. With 55 days no porn you should be in high rpms right now.

    Go to the doc see what he says sometimes they don’t want to prescribe you anything but start from there.
     
  7. Pedro.lives

    Pedro.lives Fapstronaut

    As for being emotional, you just gotta fight through it. I read the book of AA when that happens to me. It eventually gets better trust me, but if you relapse you just start again and have to go through it double time.
     
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  8. Nismos14

    Nismos14 Fapstronaut

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    Hey Pedro thanks for your response, I'd like to wait until 62 days or 2 months before I go to the doctor, I can deal with the dead dick, but the depression and lethargy is killing me. I don't want to relapse again, but today was a close one. I've been trying to quit this and fix my PIED for nearly 3 years, I just want to feel normal.
     
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  9. Pedro.lives

    Pedro.lives Fapstronaut

    It’s all your decision but why wait when you get fixed now? Testosterone also kills being fatigue and will give you energy all around. My two cents, I wish you the best you’re on the right path!
     
  10. arkad1

    arkad1 Fapstronaut

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    Honestly, there is no way, you just suck it up untill it ends...
     
  11. Fenix Rising

    Fenix Rising Fapstronaut

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    I'm sorry to write this, but there is little you can do except what you're already doing (eating healthy- no processed food +Vitamin D & omega3, daily aerobic exercise, daily sun exposure, sleeping 7-9h a day). Dopamine levels fluctuate wildly for the first 2-4 months (if not in hardmode even longer) causing periodic states of euphoria and depression. Dopamine levels do return to base line but as I said before, it takes time. You're going through rebalancing of your brain chemistry. Stay strong and be patient. Your mood will stabilize eventually.

    [​IMG]
     
  12. Nismos14

    Nismos14 Fapstronaut

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    Hey man thanks for your information, really interesting. Hopefully it will get better soon.. I'm not gonna give up, I can't do that to myself and my partner again. Just gotta keep my mind occupied...
     
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  13. Pedro.lives

    Pedro.lives Fapstronaut

    This FACT. I quit drinking about 6.5 months ago, then as I was feeling slightly better in about 2.5 months I did mushrooms, thinking “spiritual drugs are okay”. It wasn’t as I’m going through crazy mood swings for the last four months of no drugs/ alcohol use.

    This relates to all addictions as your dopamine levels are trying to get back to normal from you killing it before. As I have talked to other people in recovery, you just have to fight it and it gets better! But if you relapse think about going through that shit all over again! I’m pass on that thank you!
     
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  14. Younameit

    Younameit Fapstronaut

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    That's the flatline bro, I'm also in this numbed state, you have no emotions at all, no energy, no libido, it's fucking insane
    if your parents died today you wouldn't even cry (since sadness is an emotion, you wouldn't feel it)
     
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  15. Younameit

    Younameit Fapstronaut

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    another thing, if you "want" to relapse or have the urge to relapse, you're not in a flatline, you're experiencing withdraws, which is different, one of the withdrawals is the flatline.
    When you're in a full-blown flatline you feel absolutely no libido at all, no erection, nothing, a complete lack of sex drive
     
  16. Anonymous86

    Anonymous86 Fapstronaut

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    I am in a full-blown flatline and I still relapse. wtf?
     
  17. Younameit

    Younameit Fapstronaut

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    It's not a flatline then
     
  18. Nismos14

    Nismos14 Fapstronaut

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    Hey man, thanks for your response. I'd have to disagree with you there.

    I've been in this state many times before, for the past 3 years I've been trying to quit PMO. During multiple failed attempts over the years I had been in a flatline for over a month and had absolutely no sex drive. I got so depressed and anxious about not having any sexual desires or a working penis to the point where I made the decision to relapse to restart my sex drive/libido, so I could get semi erect to have real sex with my partner. But of course in hindsight it was the worst thing I could have done, I may have regained some sex drive and some erections, but it was in a negative way associated to porn.

    I am currently in a flatline, and have been for over 6 weeks. I have no libido and no erections, no urges to PMO but that's when I crave a relapse the most to kick start my sex drive again, to escape the numbness. But this time I haven't and wont relapse, because I know if I ride it out, a healthy non porn associated libido will return.

    I know what a flatline feels like and this definitely is a flatline, I'm just asking for healthy ways to deal with the lethargy & depression that comes from being in a total flatline.
     
    Last edited: May 22, 2019
  19. Big Lebowski

    Big Lebowski Fapstronaut

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    I’ve been relapsing for years in a flatline with no emotion or no libido and not a full erection.
     
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  20. Anonymous86

    Anonymous86 Fapstronaut

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    What is it then?
     

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