Giving up Completely on Dating. Who’s With Me?

Yeah man I advice you to stay in your cave and do this 500 days reboot.right Now you’re not good enough.
You have to stay in your cave and stop masturbating for a year and a half if you want to say hi to a woman.
Come on, it's common sense

 

Yes, you will find a virgin woman and you will live an unconditional love for the rest of your life. Like in the Disney movies!

I'll stop reading all this crap and go to sleep. Good luck, you will need it bro

 

We met through instagram because of mutual interests, we had a lot in common, and then we both decided to delete social media and pursue each other. I lived in New York and she lived in Washington state! We talked for a few months on the phone and then I flew to meet her multiple times until I finally moved to her city and got us an apartment. We are very in love and plan on getting married eventually.

My biggest suggestion is don't waste your time on any woman, only the right woman. Focus on your hobbies and career and making yourself interesting. Travel and have stories to tell. After you've built yourself up a little bit, put yourself out there. Have interesting things to talk about that are impressive. My girl loves when I drop knowledge on her, that is where the true power lies. Most of these guys with money and fame have no personality and are weak men who use only know how to use their money, not their mind.

 

I like your mentality especially About growing from the inside first love yourself first know your pro and cons work on them then you will find the right girl and I want to say for the guy s here that beauty is something we define be ourselves it’s not always in a pretty face hot body girl for someone else those things worth nothing if the girl is empty from inside

 

You have my sincere respect for this!

Thanks for your advice, but from own experience I can say, advice from addicts is not worth much.

And don't worry, my counter is almost at 500 days
And also, don't worry about my value, I feel better, more pure, more peaceful than ever before.

To be honest, It's sad that you need this tone in your comments.
This typical undertone that intoxicates your messages. You sound very disrespectful.
But I'm afraid you can't help it as you are not pure inside.
A toxic heart brings forth toxicity.

I was doing my dishes and a picture popped up.
I will share it here. I think it's true. I hope it will encourage others to create a good and rich life.


Having sexual intercourse is a transaction.
An emotional and spiritual transaction.
Every time you have sex you share a deep valuable part of myself with the wife you are with. And she gives a part of her to you.

When you have had sex with let's say 100 girls, you have given away a part of yourself to 100 others. Gone forever.
Plus you have created a bond with all of these girls.
Every time you share the bed with another girl, you actually share all the parts of the girls before with that new girl.
The upper picture.

That's why I can't feel the slightest feeling of jealousy for your lifestyle.
I namely can write out where this all ends.
Personally I think you are creating a base in your current life where in the future you will reap very sour fruits of. I don't know what you need before you hit the wall, but believe me, you WILL gonna meet this wall. I have no single doubt about that.

I'm awarding you the amount of girls you want, yes I'm really awarding you that, but personally I don't need such a life style. I would step from my porn addiction into a real life sex addiction. Please no!

Looking at that picture, I prefer to have the lower situation.

With this having said, I wish you nothing but the best. And that's sincerly said.

 

I've never really thought about it like that before. American culture today really celebrates men who "get" a lot of women, and not men who establish lasting connections. As an upperclassman high schooler I find it crazy how fast my friends move through girlfriends and then just forget about them. But if you're having sex with them that should be treated like a life-changing thing! The one girlfriend I had I never had sex with and I'm glad I never did seeing she wasn't the right one for me in the end. My pfp definitely contradicts my values lol! I'm really surprised at the kind of mindsets men have today, treating women like collectible toys.

 

I think I never heard so much bullshit in one post but anyway.. okay man I lost 100 parts of myself lol ahaha.
I won’t try to convince any of you to take responsability for your love life and take action. It’s common sense and I think you know you have to do something about it deep down.
Having a rich life doesn’t mean you will find someone. I know many guys who have a job, friends, healthy lifestyle and still unable to find someone for years.
Because things don’t just happen. You can’t rely on luck to find the girl you want to spend your life with. It’s much more complex than just waiting, doing your 500 days reboot and getting your shit together.
you will get in a relationship when you can, not when you want to. That's the real difference. and then you blame it on connection and because your values are too high to « chase »women. What a shame.

I think my posts have awakened some of your insecurities and made you face your responsibilities. And instead of admitting the truth to yourself you prefer to ignore that and shoot me down to feel a little less bad
You have no idea how much I don't care about your opinion of me... I've been rejected so many times that a guy who thinks I'm a sex addict isn't going to hurt me or question who I am. But nice try

results speak louder than words. And if I look at my life today, these results speak as much externally as internally. And yet I continue to question things and learn every day.
You, you are stuck in your ego and you don't take action. You post to judge people or complain about life instead.
Btw this is one of the things that repels women.

I'm not going to waste any more time answering you, unfortunately you're not worth it. Even though I like to pass on and help people.
You already told me a few months ago that you had problems of comparison to others and ego and that you were working on it. Apparently that hasn't changed.

 

You're on anti-anxiety meds though, that's basically cheating. It's like a dude walking on hot coals, sounds super impressive at first until you find out he takes pain-numbing injections in his feet.

 

I’m not taking any meds. I took some meds 1 year ago because I went through depression and anxiety. but I’m fully healed now! I think your post wasn’t necessary dude. Thanks for showing such empathy

if I can meet girls it’s just because I approached many women. I understand social dynamics and what women like. And i’m able to communicate it. That’s it. Some people here are telling me i’m bragging but no, at some point you have to be proud for all the job you’ve done to become so free. And that’s my case
I still get rejected sometimes but I live with no regrets. Because my level of fear is almost inexistant compared to before !

 

Ooh, is that true?
Oh but then I can't believe one single word of what you try to say here @Spirituss
Actually it all makes more sense to me.

And you say that results speak louder than words?
Yeah but my results are based on a pure heart, because I am using zero medicines.
What I feel is the real deal.

You have serious issues to solve man.
And sex is not gonna help you with that.
It should not surprise me if you suffer from a serious abandonment anxiety or something.

You better first solve that issues so you will be able to live your life without meds.

 

You may call that bullshit. I don't care.
One day you will remember that picture.
And for the rest, do what you want, you will reap what you sow.
That's enough for me here.

 

Somewhat related, I was having banter with a girl on an online dating app recently. Her occupation was researcher, so I opened with "what are you're research interests, besides me?" Yes, this is a cookie-cutter, if not clever, point of entry, but she decided to match with me.

Her opening line was "seeing how many seedless grapes I can swallow before vomiting." I knew she had no interest from the start. I went back and forth mirroring and matching her humor. At the end of it, she admitted she was messing with me, her way of apologizing for wasting time or pranking the interaction. A 23-year-old woman acting like a perverse schoolboy. Shallow as shallow can be.

This is the kind of woman you can run into online whenever you put a genuine foot forward.
You heard of needle in a haystack? Well, online dating here is like finding hay in a needlestack.

 

This is just a thought. Has anyone tried travelling the world in search of places concentrated with high-quality women? Maybe even go to another city or country: you might find prettier and with lesser body count. As long as she speaks English and has the same religious/moral values, it's a start
The world is vast

 

All you have to do to start going to church is this:

1) Go online, find a list of churches in your area. Write down the address, service times, and if there are any midweek activities like a "Young Adult" group, or "Men's Group", or "Community Service" group. Anything like this. Most churches, at least mid sized to large ones, they will have a website. Compile a list of some good potential churches to attend.

2) Prepare to go to the church. Even if you have just PMO'd, you can still go to church. Don't let that keep you from going. But still, it is better to not PMO before going to church. The longer the streak the better. Some other preparations for going to the church are picking out some good clothing to wear. There are many options for good clothing to wear, and in the end, it doesn't really matter what you wear, but this is going to affect the type of impression you make on others. So for a man like yourself - in shape with the start of a good career, I'd go with a conservative colored, button down shirt and some dress pants. You could also wear a nice sweater instead if you want to give off a less intense vibe. But again, it doesn't really matter, just be clean, don't PMO, and maybe read some of the Bible on the week leading up to attending the church service.

3) On the day of the church service (usually Sunday) or a midweek activity (Monday - Friday), set your mind to attend the service. Be excited about it. Eat well, go to the gym that day if you'd like as well. Shower, brush teeth, and all the other essential things for going out in public.

4) Arriving to the church. If you go on a Sunday, this is the main day for churches. Sundays are the big day and it is when everyone from the church attends. If you go to a midweek service or activity, there won't be as much people, and the service won't be as "official". Either day is good to go. Again, this first day of attending the church, you should dress nice and be clean, and be nice to everyone. Many people will come up and talk to you, usually the guys. The guys at the church will invite you to hang out with them or at least exchange phone numbers. I have went to church many times and was hoping I would meet a girl, but that is not really the procedure for getting a girlfriend in the church community. At least most of the time. If you want to meet a girl who is a central part of the church (and a higher chance of being a virgin), then you have to become part of the church community. Also, if you establish yourself as a strong, steady man with biblical values AND at least a middle class job, you may even meet a father of a virgin girl who likes you and wants to consider you as a potential husband for his daughter.

5) Stability. Once you have found a church you think is a good pick in terms of the people there, amount/quality of women, location, preacher, church layout... then you must show yourself to be a stable member of the church. You should attend every Sunday service, and also try to participate in at least 1 mid week activity. Churches host a lot of midweek activities during the week like I mentioned before. Some are Young Adult groups which are a mixture of men and women (and some virgin girls as well). Other midweek services could be a Men's Group, or some churches will have a weekly bible study or a Wednesday night prayer group or service or something like that.

I have outlined the exact steps you need to take to become part of a church. The process is very easy. They WANT you to become part of a church. And the people there are very nice. And if you play your cards right, you may even have access to a virgin girl at the church for a potential wife. There are some very, very traditional people at church. Many girls at the church desire a baby more than anything else. I went on a date with a girl from a church last year who had been constructing her life and financial resources in order to have a baby! and she was only like 22! A lot, but not all, of the girls at church are sort of like they are in the 18th century. They aren't really affected by modern society.

Anyways, please go to a church. I don't know why you haven't gone yet. You say you don't know where to start? The process is really, really simple. Show yourself to be a strong, stable man with the ability to bring in at least a moderate amount of $$, and you will be accepted with open arms into the church.

And a secret: with time, you can be accepted into the "inner community" of the church. These are the people that are a central part of the church. Which usually involves some girls who are virgins.

What you want is within your reach. All it takes is the effort to go to church and a little bit of luck to find a virgin.

I have listed the EXACT steps to find a church, attend a church, and become part of the church community. Please go to the church. If you have any questions about church, feel free to send me a message or write back on here anytime!

I also will start going to church again. Even though I don't yet have a good income to be seen as a potential husband, I will make an effort to go again. I quit going for a while but I will go again.

Good luck!

 

It's ok if you do. When the war in Ukraine started I wondered how many virgins were being killed. I looked it up and the number of deaths is 14,200–14,400. Pretty sure many of those people killed were virgins. Worse still some civilians have been raped by soldiers. You say screw modern society but at least you're not in a literal war where there's a real possibility you'd be killed (unless you're from Ukraine or another country at war).

To answer the question of this thread, no I haven't given up on dating but I'm not actively doing it either. The fact is I'm too busy since I've gone back to school and working part-time. If I happen to meet someone like a fellow student and we have a connection I might date her but I'm not looking for it. At the moment I definitely can't date someone who needs constant attention. It's more likely I'll start dating after I've graduated. I'm not bothered either way since I've gotten to the point where I'm content with being single or being in a relationship since both have their pros and cons. Life is suffering and the sooner we embrace suffering the better our life becomes.