Question For Ladies - Best Flirting You've Received

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by aps1991, Jul 30, 2017.

  1. aps1991

    aps1991 Fapstronaut

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    Hi,

    Ladies - do you have any examples you can give me of the best flirting you've received from a guy? Today I've realised that I'm not actually 100% clear on how best to flirt with women. I'm not sure how to tread that fine line between flirting and being vulgar/inappropriate. I want to flirt like the gentleman who opens a door for a woman and gently spanks her as she walks through!

    Is it in the way he looks into your eyes? Is it in the words he says? Does he make playful comments about your body?

    Your advice will be invaluable.

    Andrew
     
  2. The Wrestler

    The Wrestler Fapstronaut

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    Fun, playful and without agenda - the best flirting might end up leading to something, but if you make that something your expressed goal, anything you say becomes creepy. Make your goal to have fun and make the girl smile. The guy who holds the door and spanks her on the way through knows that woman, and knows her well. There will be time for spanking when you get to know her, too. ;)

    If you are not sure how to walk the fine line between flirty and vulgar, simply avoid being vulgar! Far better to play it clean and keep a door open than be gross and slam it shut.

    Best lines I've ever used on women, judging from their responses:
    *when the bus hit the brakes and she fell into me* "It's not often that beautiful women throw themselves at me!" (She laughed and we chatted for a bit).
    *in a crowded club out with my buddies, she got knocked into me at our table* "If I didn't know any better, I'd say you were hitting on me!"
    To which she turned around, coyly touched her lip and said, "Maaybe!" and disappeared.
    ...I'm pretty sure our jaws hit the floor.
     
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  3. aps1991

    aps1991 Fapstronaut

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    Excellent answer - thank you very much!

    I struggle to take the agenda out of it - mainly because my romantic/sexual needs aren't being met generally. Any tips on how to overcome that aspect?
     
  4. Kenzi

    Kenzi Fapstronaut



    This also applies.
    So much.
     
  5. Kyostaa

    Kyostaa Fapstronaut

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    Part of the fun is that there is no general formula to know.
    It's pretty much like fishing. You'll never know if you're using the right type of lure, throwing, weigth, until it's pretty obvious some fish is already stuck to your hook.

    But, to catch some fish you gotta hit the water. You have to expose yourself. Gotta learn how to be nice to women (assuming you're into them). In general, women like men that are fun, make them laugh expontaneously and seem to be trustworthy. Having a good appearance helps, even more for short term stuff. They then to value things like self care more than looks for the long run, though.

    Being a fast answerer may be the key sometimes. A few weeks ago, there is this *extremely* hot chick from the gym which I sometimes exchange some words. Once I heard her and another girl talking something like "when are we meeting for the breeding?" (not in english, though. Sounded more suggestive, or kinky, in portuguese). That felt weird in my ears and I simply stood there with a face. They both laughed, and then she explained me that they were talking about dogs. She'd soon tell me that it couldn't be anything involving her, because "I haven't done anything like that lately". THAT drew my attention. Why the hell would she say that? We barely knew each other. Whatever her reasons were, THAT was the exact moment that a good phrase could extract a good laugh AND maybe - it's always maybes - put me closer to her, and start climbing from there. She's single, it could happen... But I just laughed and played along. Because I'm married. Even though I love my wife, I must say that she isn't as half as hot as this girl - if such a measure can be taken.

    But, when I was younger, I used to be somewhat popular with girls, in times where having sex was something hard to happen and, when alone with a girl, we'd usually just trade kiss, sometimes touch each other. I usually got involved with girls already on my social circle. We talked, exchanged some laughs, and soon we'd be together. Sometimes, some girls would approach me, making obvious what their intents were, but... even though that's good for the ego, those weren't the most fun situations. The flirting has some magic that you discover as it unfolds.

    I only tried approaching a woman seriously once, in my entire life. I felt that she was interesting from the very first time I saw her. Took me a few days to get the courage to talk to her. It was extremely awkward, but we became friends... then we moved to another cities and kept contact only thru the internet. The years passed and, well, we're married now. I know it's hard to believe. I don't even know why I'm telling this.
     
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  6. Hi Andrew,
    I'm a girl
    The secret is confidence. Words dont watter. You don't need to be an intellectual. Doesn't matter if a guy got muscles or not but how he carries himself

    That makes the girl feel protected but at the same time he is the man in the relationship. I had a guy who i have been with for several months and at some point in the beginning grabbed me and kissed me and it was beautiful (we kissed few times before that). Take the lead in this way

    Just show her that when you are with her she has nothing to worry about that you will think about everything and she just wants to be hugged, taken care and treated with respect
     
    aps1991 likes this.
  7. GG2002

    GG2002 Fapstronaut

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    I'm female and I agree with the other female who commented that there is no set formula. I think most women think pick up lines are cheesey myself included and there is no one line for each situation. If you are in a public place like a bar and you see a woman you like try and make eye contact with her a few times. If she makes eye contact with you and holds your gaze a few times that's a sign that she's interested usually and then just approach and introduce yourself. If I was not interested I would look away or to the ground. The biggest thing is confidence and the men who get the most girls are the ones that are not afraid of being shot down. If she brushes you off on this the next. Do not act creepy. Don't get caught staring at her body parts, don't touch her, and stay away from sexual comments. Honestly I'd stay away from any comments about appearance. Just talk to her like you would to anyone else. Ask her about herself. Women are people just like you! I think tv shows make it seem like there is one great pick up line but there's usually not. Some people by nature she really smooth men and women. They ooze charisma, Bill Clinton comes to mind as someone like that. You can't usually learn that it's something you have or don't. But work with who you are, be yourself is the go to advice and I could not agree more!
     
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  8. I agree with it btw I love "how I met your mother" :)
     
    Kenzi likes this.
  9. aps1991

    aps1991 Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for this. But how can I express my intent if I don't make any comments about my attraction to her? Surely she'll think I'm just another nice guy and nothing more.
     
  10. GG2002

    GG2002 Fapstronaut

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    You ask for her number? You ask if she would like to get together for coffee sometime or dinner? You ask if she would like to dance if you are at a dance club. Something like I really enjoyed talking with you and was wondering if you would like to get together sometime? If the two of you connected on a topic say bowling or football suggest doing that. For the most part women know if a man is asking ther type of thing and they just met he's interested in more than friendship. Complimenting a strangers looks almost always comes off as creepy to the woman even if done with good taste. And if she's a very attractive girl she's tired of hearing about her looks and body you gotta be different.
     
    aps1991 likes this.
  11. aps1991

    aps1991 Fapstronaut

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    Thanks - I'll give this a shot. I do like the idea of connecting with a girl first.

    I'm concerned that she'll just think I'm asking to meet with her as a friend, though. Do you have any examples where a guy has asked you out in this way but it was clear he was attracted to you? How did he express his attraction (and at what stage)?
     
  12. GG2002

    GG2002 Fapstronaut

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    On the first meeting something like I would like to get to know you better can I take you out to dinner? In my opinion you don't need to express in words that you are attracted to someone on the first meeting. Honestly you don't know what your own intentions are at that point you have only seen the person you don't know anything about them. You could go on a first date and the person could become horribly ugly to you based on personality. Some of the most attractive people have horrible personalities and when you are looking to have a relationship a 6 on looks and 10 on compatibility is much better than the reverse. Sometimes porn warps this and causes you to only see looks. My advice after that is to get a kiss in no later than the third date. If she's made it to the third date with you she's open to a kiss and if you don't give it the her by then it is possible you could be friend zoned. Sometimes though you are destined to be friend zoned and it has nothing to do with you, the attraction is just not there on her end. But if you attempt the kiss on date 3 and get shot down unless she's expressed to you before she likes to move slowly or is really religious or something then you can know it's time to move on. I was always very direct with men I was not interested in but some women are not. As a gender we are taught to be nice so often a woman can't bring herself to tell you. The biggest thing is not to have expectations early on. Don't put all your eggs in one basket. I don't know if you online date but a lot of people that do it are too invested too early. So they meet a person and after the first date they see them spending their lives together and so when that person does not feel the same they are devastated. Dating involves having a tough skin but the more you do it the easier it is. We all get rejected even the most attractive people do. I'm not an anxious person at all and it frustrates my friends to no end who do when I say this but it's true, don't overthink it, get out of your own head, and just go with it and accept whatever outcome you get. Know if you get rejected that's okay. There's another girl out there for you. I think the men who succeed the most follow this type of thinking. It says to the woman yes I'm interested but I'm not needy. Maybe online dating would be good for you or speed dating so then you know people are there to date. You don't have the akwardness of letting someone know your interest.
     
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