Don't beat yourself up. A relapse shows that you need to deal with something. You'll find the solution sooner or later. As I did find a solution to my problem today. The relapse is unpleasant but it can be springboard for a change.
Am back from another rock bottom and wanting to get red pilled again. I could list my “excuses” but I’m going to own the whole deal. I won’t let that happen again. Glad to see this is still going! I choose the blue pill. Day 0
Glad to have you back! I shall re-add you to the Participants Page. The Porn Matrix is stronger than we all realise, although the likes of @Ūruz and @Pauley continue to show that it can be defeated on a daily basis.
$ Beware Spoiler Alert $ I ended up sexting and showing myself on internet and I am well aware that the girls pic I got wasn’t even her fresh pic. She used old pic which she either got from internet or clicked her pic long ago. It is always without face and so disconnected after I ejaculate. Its empty as shit. Yet I repeat the mistake, luckily its much better than the weird porn I used to watch. So I am on track to improvement I still presume not taking too much pressure of the mistakes I make. Reset, Day 0.
Honestly, I'd refrain from exposing yourself through the internet/texting in any way.. as well as avoiding people who do. It's meant to be face to face, with someone you trust.. intimate, no? This is the exact instant gratification we always crave about.. and it destroys the meaning of a serious relationship. We all feel you bud, you're not alone.
Again a reset. I am not even trying to refrain myself from masturbation. It feels very humiliating to accept and announce here that I made a same mistake again which I am doing for 9 years. I want to make this month better. I know how to quit this But I am not sticking to it because I have become habitual of my current lifestyle. I need to change it at any cost.
I would not do that again but I have already done that a lot of times. Being utterly stupid, I let myself be exposed, it was normalized exposing my dick on omegle. Its wrong and I feel the immense damage to my relationships but I feel guilty of doing it so many times that Idk how to forgive myself for it. On top of that I got cheated on 6.5 years ago a couple times ( like after sleeping in long distance she told me she slept and cried and shit ). Despite that, I didn’t choose the path of forgiveness but took the path of revenge and I went on to have casual sex myself just to treat her the same way. She then replied the she slept again and didn’t tell me during that part of month until I told her I slept with a girl. It became so damaging that I left. But I also blame myself from the 1 year where we were in long distance relationship before she cheated on me, to be the year where I didn’t put much effort into relationship due to time zone difference and thinking it would never work. During the time also I went on to expose myself through chat a few times. It is something she knew though that I have used apps like k i k and omegle but she didn’t say anything when she found out during we were in relationship and we didn't even have argument about it so I assumed it was ok.
