Thinking of hiring an escort...

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by Thelambofdeth, Nov 17, 2019.

  1. And you live in Maryland plenty of opportunity in that state don't worry about the females just yet you need to get a good streak going . It's going to be hard and your going to cry I did yep that's what happens when you stop but when you realize you manufactured these feel good chemicals in your brain by pmoing you can break the cycle of addiction . Your brain is going to make you feel like shit for not getting what it wants . Also it's not your fault we have been told masterbation is good for you maybe for some others but not me or you or most other on the site .
     
    Last edited: Nov 20, 2019
    420 mile high likes this.
  2. Thelambofdeth

    Thelambofdeth Fapstronaut

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    Dude I can't do yoga. And socialize with who? To stop masturbation I would need to fill that void with something else. Part of why I relapse is nothing to fill my free time with.
     
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  3. I apologise , if I was reading what I wrote 2 yrs ago I would have the same reaction . Watch your brain on porn by Gary Wilson I am sure there is a YouTube vid . As far as the yoga reference The word yoga means literally means "union" or "to merge". More than a set of physical postures or exercises, Sadhguru defines yoga as a science to determine the nature of who you are and what you want to be. Nofap is like yoga it gives you the tools to overcome your compulsive behavior . I have never been so happy with myself in my life and it all started on this sight .
     
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  4. Do it. Hire a prostitute. I lost my virginity to a prostitute and I don't regret it. In fact, I wish I had done it sooner.
     
  5. itz_gioc

    itz_gioc Fapstronaut

    This is a perfect example of what the mindset in our society is like now. I'm not trying to put you on blast or anything like that. I've been seeing a lot of people with similar mindsets and really its just depressing and hard to read through sometimes. I want to try to get you out of this mindset of being depressed and alone...

    Keep in mind everyone will have good days and bad days. Just stay vigilant. That's the KEY.

    Ok so think about it this way. People in third world countries are not so fortunate enough to live in a SIMPLE house, running water, OR EVEN FOOD! Be happy with the simple things in life dude.

    Also, you have to try to not look up to people. I strongly suggest getting off social media temporarily (that means tinder too) so you can recuperate from that depressed mindset.

    You already have a good body, a job, and a home. How about trying to learn new skills? Like cooking, fixing cars, get a certificate on something you like, play co-ed soccer, etc. The women will come bro... I'm telling you right now, Women will come and they will go. If you're actively searching for instant gratification, then, of course, you will continue to be miserable.

    I was just like you back then when I was PMO'ing consistently and also have SOCIAL ANXIETY BRO! I literally couldn't stand people everywhere I go. Even within the first 2 weeks of NoFap, I was still introverted. After I PMO I would still felt empty inside since I haven't really accomplished anything. After 5min of just feeling good, its gone already. Is it going to make you any better after you bust that nut bro with a woman you just paid? How about waiting for the right one, marry, then having kids with her. Trust me you will be happy once you find that right one. YOU JUST GOTTA BE PATIENT MAN... Trust the process.

    I've also had a few months of just HARD mode. Trust me it really helps if you just don't orgasm (semen retention). You will think more clearly and have more energy.

    For me I have to work extra hard to get abs and study more to get my certs. I wasn't thinking about getting escorts man cmon. Your better than that dude.

    Be a man. You were born here for a reason to do something great. But if you still want that escort... you might as well go back to PMO.
     
  6. Thelambofdeth

    Thelambofdeth Fapstronaut

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    Dude, I've been patient. SO patient. And I've tried to better myself. In many ways. But it's so hard to see so many people have...something, while I continually have nothing. I see people, friends, just go out, or use a app, and get options. But I get so lonely that there's nothing but PMO. You waiting around thinking you'll finally get a chance or a turn, but it just never happens for me. And that's extremely frustrating.
     
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  7. olsen

    olsen Fapstronaut

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    It’s up to you to decide, but you’re not afraid to catch any infection? I personally would not risk it.
     
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  8. glasgow

    glasgow Fapstronaut

    My humble opinion is... do it if you feel too distracted about having sex.
    The problem is that you could get hooked to the hookers. Be careful. If you get used to hire scorts to mitigate your sexual desire, you could spent thousands on them. Do not fall in love with them, they will not relief your loneliness (you will feel lonely with their presence, because they don't care for you), do not make them your only way to obtain sex.

    Scorts are not the solution, they will give you temporary relief, a one moment thing... and you will crave for more, they know it, and they will try to obtain benefit for it.

    You need to find a way to meet someone that gives you the relief you need. Believe me, there are women in your position too, you just need to find out where is the right one (who in reality could be anyone).

    So, in my opinion: do it, but look for a woman that likes you and needs your company aswell, that's what you need to do.
     
  9. itz_gioc

    itz_gioc Fapstronaut


    Alright I’ll be straight with you. I’m personally still not in a relationship yet. And today I was talking to a few girls outside and felt that I could’ve done better but the spark just didn’t happen YET. From here all I have to do is expand my options and work on myself more. I also started reading Bible, mainly because there some knowledge and wisdom behind it. But this won’t be a religion talk. PM me if your interested tho. Lol

    So this is what the porn industry is doing to us bro. Once you get into it. You already feel satisfied and want more. You don’t have to apply anything in your life. You wouldn’t even have to try anymore. Being a MAN doesn’t even exist in you...there is no reason to do anything in life because you already achieved it. Am I right???

    Get off social media right now. Except for NoFap and maybe YouTube depends on what your using it for. Instagram, Tinder, Facebook, Twitter, etc., has a lot of these photoshop images of women posing and men working out showing off there muscles. Am I right? Get off it and focus on you. When you see friends and people who are in relationships. They either worked for it or just got lucky. That’s the truth. Some men don’t have to try and some men do. But like I said DONT compare yourself with the people around you. If you start comparing yourself with those people then what makes you think you can go anywhere in life YOUR WAY? God has plans for everyone. Everyday is a new day and different things will come your way. You just got to take action and remain CONSISTENT. There are days where I may want to just not do anything and days where I’m just busy and learn from my mistakes. If I lose my determination through lust and gratification then I’m back to day 0. Because I physically felt like I haven’t achieved anything. The drive is gone. That’s the truth.

    As I stated before, you just have to remain consistent, be patient, and keep working on yourself. You tried everything right? Well still keep trying. THAT IS THE KEY. I’m literally telling you the answer right here.

    And let’s say you do get into a relationship. For sure, this relationship will take most out of your time, and the girl would have to come first before anything else. That’s why you gotta work on yourself more. And do what you want. Once you choose a girl, you have to stay focused on her...it’s never gonna be about you anymore. It’s about her. That’s why it’s life draining to stay in a relationship. She will give you the courage but you won’t have the power to get what you want. You have to build on the trust between you two before moving on up. You also have to consider choosing the right girl... BUT I don’t think your at that mindset yet. So I will leave that be lol...

    But here’s the truth..Life isn’t just about feeling pleasure or gratification. Life is about achieving something little by little to receive that gratification. That’s why I said work on yourself and apply new challenges.. dude we live in the US, a first world country. Everything is already there. Don’t be lazy man.

    This would be my last post. I told you the answers and gave my suggestions in this journey. I pray you make the right choices in life and keep striving to do great things. If you still want to remain down there looking up to people and hooking up with hookers, feel free. But it won’t change anything.

    I recommend that you re-read my posts everyday so you get it through your head. Your gonna hear the same thing from other NoFap people. Or people won’t care and say Do what you want. Try to get something out of this.

    I personally haven’t achieved my goals yet but I’m still striving. Once you get passed a certain amount of days of NoFap you will understand what I mean.

    FYI, anything with BOLD and Underlined answered your previous comment.
     
    Last edited: Nov 23, 2019
  10. Sharksvv

    Sharksvv Fapstronaut

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    It’s good you bring this up, the safety of it should be discussed.

    From personal experience when I used to visit escorts and I visited like 20 of them (thankfully I’ve beat that addiction) I would say it’s fairly safe as long as protection is worn and no unprotected oral takes place giving or receiving.

    I once had the lapse in judgement in receiving unprotected oral and I thought I caught something but after numerous tests to calm my nerves I didn’t get anything thankfully.

    Also not only that condoms can break, never happened with me but it’s a real risk, imagine being inside an escort and you hear that popping snapping sound of a condom breaking open, suddenly you’re deep inside a sex worker with zero protection whatsoever, gives me chills just thinking of it.

    Don’t do it, not worth the potential life ruining aftermath of having an STD.
     
    Ihavewonwehavewon likes this.
  11. Ihavewonwehavewon

    Ihavewonwehavewon Fapstronaut

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    this , dont give in . You will be scarred forever.
     
  12. If I were in your shoes I would not go to a escort. They cost a lot of money and it is a bandage solution to your problem. There is a real danger of it becoming an addiction and also feeling empty after the encounter. LIke you can feel hurt and used in the end.

    Try to expand your interests where you can meet women such as going to a dancing event such as tango lessons and everytime I been to one there are more women than men there and you always have someone to learn to dance with.

    I wish you well
     
  13. Thelambofdeth

    Thelambofdeth Fapstronaut

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    So basically don't do it, because at this point with how lonely I am theres no way I'd not get attached. And of course, they would be my only way to get attached. People keep saying find a way to meet someone, but give no advice on how. If I knew how to do that I wouldn't be looking into hookers. The problem is I cant find a woman who wants my company or even knows I exist.
     
  14. Thelambofdeth

    Thelambofdeth Fapstronaut

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    Dude, I have crippling social anxiety...if I could go to dancing events I wouldn't have a problem approaching women in the first place. Tango is far too social for me.
     
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  15. glasgow

    glasgow Fapstronaut

    Man, just stop looking for women. Why every toung man has the need to find a woman? Why when we are just kids we tend to reject them because «eww girls» and then when hormones kick in we just NEED A WOMAN?

    Fast answer: for sex.

    That's it, go have sex, you are in a state of animal urgency, you need to release sexual desire. The fastest solution are hookers. I personally think thats better compared to go to bars and try to impress women by manipulation and lies... you even do not know if one of them has STDs, you maybe will never know.

    Oh, you only want to stop being alone, you do not want sex after all, ok:

    Go and enroll yourself in some course about something you like: cooking, handcrafting, music, arts... there will be people.

    Do not want to study?

    Go and help others doing charity work in a church or a humanitary institution. There will be people.

    Do not want to help?

    Go to a convention about something you like... heek, even furries have conventions... there will be people too.

    Do not want to socialize?

    Go and find a work on something you like... dont be too picky, do not think about working on google or something like that... something simple. You will meet people.

    You are too socially crippled too do anything related? Oh, then you are doomed.

    See, the only solution against loneliness is socializing, but you will not do that, you have social crippling depression... then what are you going to do if not a single answer satisfy you?

    The real solution is... stop chasing women and improve yourself. Learn to dance, learn to speak, learn to dress, DO THINGS with others.

    Fight against your limits. Or at least die trying hard. But stop victimizing yourself, stop waiting for someone to teach you how to be part of the society, no one comes with a «how to be human» manual... just try.
     
  16. Thelambofdeth

    Thelambofdeth Fapstronaut

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    Don't get me wrong, dude. This is all great advice and I'm not trying to come off as ungrateful. I just wish I was able, or rather strong enough to take it.
     
  17. glasgow

    glasgow Fapstronaut

    Sadly, it's not an advice man. I'm just stating the obvious.

    A good advice could be... go to professional therapy.

    You know what is the center of your problemas, that's good. Some people are in a similar situation as you and when you ask them what is their problem they respond with: "I don't know". At least you can list your weak points and start working with one at a time.

    I was trying to motivate you a bit aggresively, but I suppose that will not work.

    Just don't give up on yourself, make a plan. If you can't go to a party, just go out to a cafeteria, library or a park: read, listen to music, whatever. But do not stay on your house isolated. If you have fear to have bad symptoms then go back to home, but do not stop trying. Talk to others about your condition, you should not be ashamed about that. The only thing you should be ashamed of is for trying to hide yourself.

    You can't do it alone? Get help, physical help, not... internet help. Try to find support groups if you can.

    I do not think that I had social anxiety as you, but I was practically an hermit on my home, I would try to avoid human contact every time for at least 5 years... I couldn't say that I'm "recovered", I don't go to parties, I believe that you have more friends than I do... but at least I can have normal interactions with other people, and although I do not enjoy life the same way others do (parties, dates, sports, concerts, etc) as I'm really shy and introvert (and cynical)... I think I found a space in society in which I fit... I found a girlfriend that I love, and I think I'm not even good looking, and my pair of glasses with extra thiccness do not help at all.

    You can do it man, just keep trying, more methodicaly. There is not an only set of methods to enjoy life, you need to find you own way of living.

    Well, good luck.
     
    Thelambofdeth and PeterGrip like this.
  18. Thelambofdeth

    Thelambofdeth Fapstronaut

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    Yeah, I'm way past aggressive motivation lol. I've had friends irl try that to no avail. I wish I could be the type that randomly went to parks or coffee shops, meet ups, etc, but if I'm not going with someone or there isn't someone I already know there, I just can't. And therapy is just something I'm not going to do. Working out and buying is clothes is pretty much the most I can do, and I already did. At any rate escorts aren't legal here and seem to be too much of a hastle so that out of the question for me. So I'll just have to find some solace in solitide. Nonetheless, thanks for the replies.
     
  19. If therapy is something you don't go, how about going to a place of worship such as a Church and many people go to church by themselves and many of them just sing and or listen to the music and for them they find it healing and/or listen to the sermon. You don't have to be religious to go to church.

    Or how about take a away from where you live and spend time in a new environment such as a beach, mountain or new city? That can bring healing to you as well.
     
  20. If you can't connect with women that is not a escort you more than likely wont be able to connect with an escort . Since nofap I connect with strippers old women young women and middle age women they are all the same . Before nofap I really didn't want to talk to any women period pmo changes the way you see the world physicaly and mentally , your hormones get out of balance, dopamine and testosterone ect. Mentally your brain doesn't know the difference between porn on your computer to the real thing . It's scientifically prooven . I don't demonize porn or masterbation or think its bad but I know that if I abstain from pmo I have more control over what I want and that is to be connected to others. I have never been more happy with my life . A beautiful Latin women gave me compliment she said I am the epitome of a latin lover. I never thought any women would say that to me in this life time and I am not even Latino .
     
    Last edited: Nov 24, 2019

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