Why is it apparently a crime to be a virgin, to some people?

It just upsets me that some people on Nofap are ashamed of being a virgin, and act like it's horrible. Being a virgin, to me, is way better than having meaningless sex with everyone that you see. Any thoughts?

 

I didn't have sex until I was married at 24 years old (same with my wife who was 23). Best decision of our lives, it is so refreshing knowing that we are the only one's who we've shared that intimacy with.

If people are against saving sex for marriage that just goes to show you how insecure they are about their decisions. What they are really saying to you is, "Please go have sex ASAP so you can be miserable like me!"

Save yourself for marriage and make that moment actually mean something instead of the typical, "It's just sex" mindset.

 

I get what you're saying, and I absolutely agree. But I don't believe in marriage, because I don't think it should be validation for the true love that a man and a woman have for each other (and because I'm non-religious, and I'm not an atheist). If a couple should have sex before marriage, it should be until they've known each other well enough, and when the time is right. It's better to wait than to rush

 

I can respect that. For us however, marriage was a way to come together before a crowd of witnesses (most importantly God) to show that we were serious about this commitment. Without some sort of covenant, I fear human nature is to move on once someone feels they've made a mistake in who they've committed to (which usually means until a more sexually attractive person comes along).

And in reality, they are right - they did make a mistake. Even a wise man after a lifetime of experience would be extremely hard pressed in making a sound judgement concerning whom (among all possible choices) would be the best spouse for them. Many (dare I say all?) marriages, even the most joyful, are mistakes in the sense that both statistically could have chosen someone slightly better. But that's not the point, because the true soulmate is the one whom you've chosen, the one you actually committed to in marriage, the one whom you said, "through thick and thin, no matter what, I'm yours."

 

You just gotta know the person really well, and see if you truly love them from the bottom of your heart.

 

I love my wife, with all my heart. However, human nature doesn't change. If not for my commitment to God, her, and my family via marriage, I'd be hard pressed to resist the temptation to move onto another "more suitable" mate.

I get what you're saying, but I believe you give our instincts far too much credit. Look at how things work in the wild, I don't trust just "loving her with all my heart." I need to make a commitment in front of witnesses. In the midst of a fight with my spouse, the commitment is what I remember (because in that moment I don't "feel" like loving her).

 

I get what you're saying. But I believe that you can be committed to her and marry her spiritually, which [to me] is better than marriage. I'm just saying.

 

Blame Hollywood, the mainstream media, and society for that.

They're super brainwashed

 

What you're describing in my view is marriage (a commitment before God that transcends the physical). For the record, I don't agree with the government institution of marriage. Quite frankly I wonder why the government is involved in marriage at all. It's really none of their business.

 

Why do you think they ask for "marriage licenses?" They wanna license everything because they wanna control everything. But I don't wanna go off-topic. PM me or go to my Meeting Of The Minds thread if you wanna talk about stuff like that.

 

I was over exaggerating. LOL
I said it like that because most people on Nofap make it seem like it's horrible to be a virgin.

 

Roger that, I just wanted to make sure I distinguished between "marriage" and a government issued "marriage license." To me those are two entirely different things. That's all I was getting at