Cured and Need Advice

Oh i'm so sorry bro

I don't know what to say.buy in this case you must have power to believe your self.and how long you can maintaining an erection?maybe kegel exercise can help you to train maintaining your erection

 

Firts you must calm down, , ,see your self in the mirror,take the deep breath,and say to your self that you can make yourself and your girl happy,you re strong man so god give you ED to test your strengh.now you re cure and you re ready to rumble.. .show to your girlfriend that you re healed and you can "be a man".

 

LOL relax and get it off your mind. If it is on your mind, then it is going to be harder to get aroused. Be honest with your girl friend and let her know what is going on and that you are really learning a new way. I cannot think myself of having sex where something that I do not identify as a porno fantasy where acted out or played out or done by a girl friend "into" the same sickness as me, or what was in the back of my mind, wasnt what aroused me (I am 70 so I do not have the same energy you have).''

I know it is going to take e time to learn how to get aroused with my wife even if I were cured tomorrow.

Be patient, and get it off your mind. Realize this is new. Have a little confidence.

And when you succeed. PLEASE COME BACK HERE AND POST WHAT SUCCEEDED we have too many pity parties here and we need to hear about your success.

 

We re here to help you and pray for your success. . . .

 

Dude really... i wouldn't chase that ex of yours if het reason for not dating is that you might not be sexually able. That's putting a lot of pressure on you and it's just simply not a nice thing to think. How could you not be anxious under the circumstances?

 

I am a woman and I have to say, she should be telling you that it's OK if you can't stay hard, and that she'll be there for you as long as it takes. She should be encouraging you to work on things, together, slowly.

She should also be really proud of you.

Putting that kind of pressure on someone, especially someone who has done remarkable things to better themselves, is not fair and quite frankly not very nice. It's also pretty much guaranteed to amount to what she perceives as failure.

I get the feeling from your post that you are worried you are not good enough for her.. can I suggest you ask yourself, 'is this person good enough for ME?'

 

Nicely put!

 

what it seems to me is that you may be reducing your relationship to a physical one, and not one of friendship or deeper love. If a woman wants to be with you, it should be wanting to be with YOU, not with your penis when it is hard. If you think that is all you are worth to this woman or any other woman, then the porn has done that to you. I am Black and lets just say that part of my body meets a certain ethnic stereotype. I went through a long period when I was young where I thought women primarily wanted to be with me because of "what I could do" even if most women I met were involved in activities where I was internationally acknowledged as an oustanding person making valuable intellectual contributions. I came to realize that the problem was inside me and had to do with my not feeling worthy emotionally and not feeling a full citizen and not understanding the friendly and positive romantic aspects of a romance because my parents marriage was marked by my fathers addictions and physical abuse. If you just think a woman wants a penis, either you are devaluing yourself or devaluing women or with the wrong women. All of this has to do with the way we do not love and accept ourselves as human beings with all our warts and wrinkles.

My own belief is that it helps to get yourself together NoFap and psychologically first before plunging into a relationship. Often your relationships can mark how disorganized or disjointed your life is. You are not going to get to the point of dealing with NoFap that we all are without needing to chill out the rest of your life, straighten it out, decide to have your values lead your life. People get into porn and masturbation because it is easier than dealing with life and its complexities and then because it addicts us physically in regard to our brain and body chemistry.

SEE YOUR FIRST GOAL IS GETTING TOTALLY CLEAN. Have your next goals as looking into the rest of your life and straightening out what is as messed up as your faping. Do not neglect issues like your education, your finances, your health, and your appearance. If you mess yourself up with porn and masturbation and related crap like we all have, it will be crazy to think just stopping masturbating or not looking at porn is going to straigthen you out.

Going BACK to a girl friend who was your girl friend when you were into fapping might not be a solid thing to do if you were healthy.

LOL I can think of women I dated who were into that scene as far as I was and wonder why did I ever even know such a person. I decades of being into it, women I met who got into the pictures, watching porn, or dressing provocatively or going to swingers clubs ended up figuring out that they had real pyschotic mental illnesses or drug addictions. When I was fapping I would fantasize going back to one or another of them forgetting that side of them, or how it messed me up.

Life is best done by going forward, not going back

 

LOL women might be even more sensitive to having someone pressure them to be have sex when they are not physically into it or able than men. You dont realize it, but as a man in his 70s looking back at things, reading the issues you have, I can think of times with women where they didnt feel up to it physically or even had a health problem and I pressured them or even broke up with someone when this happened. The issue is that is there anything more important than your sexual performance that this woman wants from you? Is there something about you that makes you not feel you are worth more than that to a woman or yourself. I think that is behind a lot of my own problems.

I would step back and think about how healthy the whole of you is, not just nofap