Moments in time... my journal

Discussion in 'Significant Other Journals' started by GID2020, Oct 20, 2019.

  1. GID2020

    GID2020 Fapstronaut

    I appreciate that aspect of it as well. It is important to understand the struggle of the person who is addicted and I think I'm able to empathize pretty well with my husband and I would say this place has helped with that. What doesn't help is reading stories of women stuck in their betrayal trauma. It's not healthy for me.

    Yes, and it's something I do stick with because its helped me tremendously. I used to get awful migraines after I would binge on too much sugar. For me it isn't about weight loss, but just about being healthy. That's why I do it. Seems to me that I need to start only doing things that are healthy for me...should be my mantra.
    Thank you. Hope all is going well for you too!:)
  2. GID2020

    GID2020 Fapstronaut

    Yes, I agree 100%!

    As far as the discord channel I tried out the channel for women and while Jagliana was very nice I got a o_O face from another participant after I posted something. Seemed like a place to bash men.. no thanks. Don't know how the men's channel is but I let my husband know about it already and he can decide if it's for him.
    Psalm27:1my light and JustADude like this.
  3. JustADude

    JustADude Fapstronaut

    Thanks for writing that. Sometimes I think the spouses on nofap are OK with excessive addict shaming. I try to not let it bother me because I think that women are different in how they need to vent and heal compared to men. But, it worries me that support groups might lengthen the healing process through unhealthy and negatively reinforcing addict bashing.

    The men's channel hasn't had any woman bashing since I joined... it is pretty laid back... just supportive. It is probably easier for us addicts to keep our cool because we aren't the recipients of our spouse's misdeeds.
    Last edited: Mar 13, 2020
    GID2020 likes this.
  4. Psalm27:1my light

    Psalm27:1my light Fapstronaut

    Oh, I hope that wasn’t me?! If it was just know that I don’t intentionally post faces sometimes they just appear and I’m not sure why because I suck so much with my phone!! About the “ men” bashing, I’ve found that certain people do seem stuck in “ victim “ and unable to move past it. I think maybe it has to do with feeling powerless to change their situation. I’m not sure. I think too, although we share similar experiences with our husbands having an addiction, we are all married to different men. If I had to deal with someone who was going to escorts and I felt I couldn’t leave, maybe I too would be bashing! Idk. You have people in varying degrees of trauma, some are further in their healing than others. I kinda skim over the “ man haters”.....
    JustADude likes this.
  5. GID2020

    GID2020 Fapstronaut

    No problem. I would agree with that statement as well.

    I think that's why I'm not reading as many posts on here as I was in the beginning.

    I'm glad to hear the men's channel is supportive. That's really great.:)
  6. GID2020

    GID2020 Fapstronaut

    No, it wasn't you.:)

    Yeah. I understand that is probably the case. I would prefer to not surround myself with that kind of negativity.

    Good idea!
  7. Hello @GID2020 , just wondering how you're doing?
    GID2020 likes this.
  8. Psalm27:1my light

    Psalm27:1my light Fapstronaut

    I think she left the forum.
  9. GID2020

    GID2020 Fapstronaut

    Hi @hope4healing. You're so sweet to check up on me. Everything is going really well. I don't have much time to write today but I will try to sit down soon and write out my thoughts. I hope that you are doing well and I appreciate you asking how I am. ❤
  10. engelman

    engelman Fapstronaut

    I was thinking the same. Neither she nor her husband were active on NoFap for months. I'm quite glad to know everything's going "really well". Keep (both) with your healing!

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