Relapsing after 32 days of no PMO

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Sleepingbadger, Mar 3, 2018.

  1. Sleepingbadger

    Sleepingbadger Fapstronaut

    I relapsed today after my longest streak ever. I hate myself so much now. The worst thing about this is that I could have easily prevented this but I felt like I didn't want to. I was taking a shower and I could have turned the water temperature to cold, but I didn't do it. :(

    My streak felt so promising, I thought I could finally be free of this addiction. During my reboot I made so much progress; made a new friend, learned to enjoy being social and also started to enjoy reading romantic novels that didn't include any sex. I felt awesome almost every day. :)

    And then, after I hit day 30, I started to be really tempted every day, and eventually relapsed. I feel like all the benefits are going away. I'm feeling depressed, antisocial and tired.

    Do you guys have any tips for me so I can avoid this in the future? Also, how can I get the willpower to try again back?

    PS. To all of you: Few seconds of enjoyment isn't worth years of happiness. :emoji_frowning2:
  2. Don't worry. You've made quite an accomplishment.
    I relapsed around 43 days, but it wasn't all lost. I feel like it's easier now to start better habits and to avoid PM.
    Remember it takes time to change habits, especielly when its a several years enforced habit. So of course there will be bumps on the road.
    Get back up and focus on the positives. You did 30 days. Next time it will be much more!
    Sleepingbadger likes this.
  3. Continue your progress. You gained a new friend, learned new stuff about yourself. Use it, and continue developing. It's not lost because of a relapse.
    Sleepingbadger likes this.
  4. Sleepingbadger

    Sleepingbadger Fapstronaut

    Thank you for your reply. It made me feel a bit better :). Starting my new streak right now, not tomorrow or next week!
    Deleted Account likes this.
  5. we\re here to help eachother when we need it. Good luck with the new streak. Let us know how it goes.
  6. Jesb

    Jesb Fapstronaut

    Even with relapses I still feel that its not a loss. You still gained in recovering. You went 30 days. That has some impact on your recovery process. Who knows maybe getting to 30 days a few times is the difference to being healed in 90 days rather than 120, or 150, or 180, ect.

    My best is 24 days not even 30. But even now as I hit day 8, I feel stronger erections. This maybe wouldn't be happening without my 24 day streak.
    Sleepingbadger likes this.
  7. Well if it happened in the shower, I'm assuming that you relapsed to mo with no p. If this is the case I'd say all is not lost and keep your head up. Just watch out for the chaser effect.
    Sleepingbadger likes this.
  8. Sleepingbadger

    Sleepingbadger Fapstronaut

    I couldn't do it, relapsed again, this time with P. :emoji_disappointed:
    I feel like actual trash.
    Feels like I'm starting to binge again and throwing away all the progress.

    Last time I relapsed i did three days binge PMO and 2-3 times a day, that was horrible.

    My problem is that after every relapse, my willpower just vanishes and then I can't control myself and just start binge.
    I hope I can find enough willpower to stop it here. :(

    Thank you all for your support, I'll try my best to fight this.
  9. Keep your head up. Read up on ur journal and see the outcome in the process you had so far. Remember the feelings and thoughts u had. Nothing can change our relapses but we can try our best to do what worked for us before it happens
    Sleepingbadger likes this.
  10. MarinoBigFan1984

    MarinoBigFan1984 Fapstronaut

    30 days at age 17 deserves a medal.
    Hobbsy21 and Sleepingbadger like this.
  11. I think that this is sort of how the process goes for a lot of us. You go on a streak, then succumb to the urges and go on a binge. Once the binge runs its coarse, you sort of reemerge from the fog and lose interest in p for another streak. The streaks get longer as your brain is letting go of this daily routine. This could take a long time, so the trick is to not beat yourself up about it. Just forget about it and keep moving forward.
    Sleepingbadger likes this.

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