The Jedi Temple (open)

Day 67

 

Padawan: 12/29

 

Day 30 - Jedi Knight


I had slip up something to do with helping my dad with his phone. For his work related stuff. While I was messing to fix his issue on a certain app leading to the interest browser (Google Chrome) on the phone. I saw many tabs and zoomed out and there were some Pron images on some of the tabs!? I immediately closed them during this process. Embarrassing It's JEDI KNIGHT's kryptonite, using the phone to view P and do M with it which is very common to do like others lol. But that is not me. Not my weakness and falling for that. That's it.

The dark side never plays fair. They are always here. The dark side of P always pull me at me from time to time.

Lastly, I created my very first Hard Mode Challenge here in the forum for myself and others if they want to join. Very simple challenge. Just Hard Mode though. Not a semen retention challenge. It's only a 10 Day Challenge as I previously mentioned here awhile back in The Jedi Temple. When you know who took my idea and turned into a challenge. An MOer in Hard Mode challenges Whatever. You can join here if your interested fellow Jedis.

Still thinking of creating more but it will be Semen Retention Challenges instead. Oh well we will see. That's it for that.

If you like Kpop
Light light light light lightsaber


Jedi out

 

Day 69

 

Day 31 - Jedi Knight

 

I relapsed a couple days ago so I'm on day 2

 

Day 70

 

Day 32 - Jedi Knight

 

Day 71

 

Day 0
Today marks the end of a 71-day streak that I poured my heart and soul into. While I'm disappointed it's over, I'm grateful for the growth and progress it brought. Here's to new beginnings and the determination to keep pushing forward.

 

Day 33 - Jedi Knight

 

Day 2

 

Day 34 - Jedi Knight

 

Day 3

I think I need a morning routine again. It's just difficult with my job that had erratic hours. And I'm back at looking for another electrician job.

On the plus side I'm having some success with trying to eat just meat. I don't have so many cravings to overeat and I'm consuming way less carbs and sugar. My cravings for junk food has pretty much disappeared.

 

Day 35 - Jedi Knight

 

Day 4

A mental block I think I've had for a long time is having resentment over how people give me respect with how young I look. Even 31 now, people still think that I just got out of high school. And even when I was a kid I felt like I didn't get the same respect, or recognition that other people my age got because I looked like the most young and inexperienced person in the room.

I think unfortunately I have focused so much on thinking about not getting recognition from people that it became the way I think about myself, rather than focusing on myself without peoples opinion. I think over the years I let myself down by forgetting to live for myself.
My feelings of resentment come from that. Consequently I didn't focus on improving myself where I would have gotten recognition from people. But in that I let myself down rather than letting other people down. The problem though is that I've still wanted respect and recognition from other people, and that its just unhealthy. I need to move on from that and to give myself respect. That's the difficult thing.

That all relates to my nofap journey because I haven't lived a life that I could feel proud about because I chased to get respect from other people. And living a life you feel proud about I think is an antidote to porn addiction. It sucks that I didn't have parents who were proud of the way that they live and that they pushed their psychological problems onto me. But now the only way I can get better is to let go of wanting their respect and to give it to myself.

 

Day 36 & 37. Checking in.

Day 37 - Jedi Knight

@JEDI KNIGHT @-Angel- and the rest.
I have created a Semen Retention Challenge of the Jedi Temple if you want to join. Not to replace The Jedi Temple (open) since this is a Hard Mode Challenge here. Any way, I am glad this is still here. If you want to participate then you can if you want.
Here

Jedi out

 

Back to day 1

I'm reading "Letters From A Stoic" again and it's Seneca's writing. One thing that grabbed me this time reading it is that he talks about being a friend to yourself. Seneca also has those phrases of being tested through fire, being broken down and built up again. But in his mind self improvement is impossible if you are not a friend to yourself. It's not self torture to him. Stoicism can easily become self torture I think taken from the wrong context, from the context of shame and guilt. And that its a requirement to befriend yourself if you want to see any improvement in your condition. You would find it very difficult to help your enemy, or even someone that you disliked.

 

Youngling: 1/6

 

Day 0 - Youngling

Same deal as last streak. Technical reset to P. Now enduring the effects of the dark side for the time being.
The Angel. is back. I'm behind you again. Let's go buddy.
And the rest I think some fell or restarted like I did.

Jedi out