Trying to prevent divorce and heal the marriage

Hey !

I just want to add my two cents. Honestly come clean and completely honest about literally everything right now . Put it all out there. I feel if you don't do that you're still lying to her,or hiding things which will make you feel guilty and make you be in your head too much as you are probably used to by now. I huge thing I think I realized is trying to differentiate between the REAL you, and the addiction you. And hopefully your wife can realise that she also needs her own help and counseling if she does decide to work through it. Hopefully she also realizes that it's not the man she married that did this to her , it's the addiction. There are so many layers of the onion it's crazy .

Good luck brother. Stay strong. Get help regardless of what your wife decides. You need to be the best father you can be ( if you have kids ) remember .... Your addiction WANTS your wife to leave , so you can go back to feeding it.

 

Yes! I've definitely been through that myself. It's taken me a very long time to understand it. For years I was telling myself the same thing... why would I want to completely quit porn? I just need to maybe cut back a little bit. It's fine. Everyone does it. It took a lot of trauma for me to finally accept that regardless of what other guys can do, I have a problem with porn and need to stop. It's a tough pill to swallow, but I'm sure it's for the best.

 

Unfortunately, sometimes honesty ruins everything. We cannot be completely honest with some close people and share with them our problems and fears.