What does a woman truely want from a man?

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by duha, Feb 27, 2018.

  1. Jen@8675309

    [email protected] Distinguished Fapstronaut

    It sounds like you've got some personal issues with women that you might need to sort out. You come across as very bitter here, and there's more than a touch of misogyny in your thoughts.
    Jennica, Gmork and GG2002 like this.
  2. Vulkan

    Vulkan Fapstronaut

    Misogyny? I am cute to women, in everyday life and much more so with women I am intimate with! I am exactly NOT one of those men gloating about women in pain, degraded, exploited etc.

    It is just my observation:
    1) there are asexual / low libido women
    2) of those who have decent libido, many are not really into men
    3) of those many are not after "normal" men

    This is obvious, we could only argue about the percentages. Depending on the individual environment others may have a different perception. Many men are expecting that there is a huge majority of women who want love with a normal man, but the years pass by and they just can´t find love and have headaches about what they do wrong.
  3. Truly a woman would prefer (prefer) a man who is confident, self sufficient, and while looks definitely help, at least tries to be the best version of himself. I find women like physical strength and thorough physical touch.
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 23, 2018
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  4. Jen@8675309

    [email protected] Distinguished Fapstronaut

    Your claim that bestiality is 'not that rare' is both incredibly offensive and ridiculous. If a man can't find a woman after many years, he is the common denominator, not all women everywhere.
    GG2002 likes this.
  5. sparkywantsnoPMO

    sparkywantsnoPMO NoFap Moderator & Yeoman
    Staff Member


    Please treat fellow users with respect. Failure to do this may result in a thread lock.
  6. JustinX

    JustinX Fapstronaut

    I never believe I would said that but I fully agree with [email protected]: you have personal issues that you should solve and you do not have correct view on women and also what makes women attracted to men and vice-versa.

    In the post (now already deleted) you complained that women preferred conman, badass, criminals over normal men and now call it even women's fetish. Guess what. There is no such thing as normal men. What you consider normal is definitely not normal in my eyes. I am not going to argue about moral thing or if it is right or wrong, but almost every conman, badass, criminal has high self-value, is risk-taker, adventurer, dont let other people walk over him, has sense of self and goes for what he want ---> all very strong masculine characteristics so no wonders that women (not all but definitely quite lot) are attracted to them. Why they wouldnt be?? They are definitely more attractive than your 'normal' men (again not normal in my eyes): somebody who puts women on pedestal, sacrifices too much of himself and his needs for women, provides no downs for women but also no ups because is afraid of taking risk, so he is monotonous and all in all boring. No shit sherlock it is hard to find woman with such un-masculine characteristics. Remember feminine is always attracted to masculine, this is the way how it works in nature.
    Last edited: Mar 19, 2018
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  7. Hagbart C.

    Hagbart C. New Fapstronaut

    Many women are into bad guys, but many are not. And no I don´t want to complain in general about women, I had some fine sexual and platonic experiences with women that I never want to forget.

    I wrote "normal" in quotes, so no real debate between us. Just consider the masculine characteristics (agressive, risks etc) can be exaggerated in an unhealthy way - I don´t say you should be all boring and afraid to be "normal".

    Not really, in nature you will see for example a lot of homo-/bisexual behaviour, observed for countless species.

    My point No. 1 was, that many women have a low sexual interest in general, grey-sexual.
    For example a survey by the Japan family planning association found that 45% of women aged 16-24 "were not interested in or despised sexual contact"
    Add some percent of women who are interested in non-platonic relationships but are homosexual or bisexual more towards women, add women who are into bad guys (and some who are into masturbation and/or weird fetishes).
    Maybe you additionally have only few women in your everyday life (because of your profession, hobbies etc) and maybe you are not that rich and handsome and it gets difficult to find a good woman (all of this is my situation).

    I believe it is one of the worst things we can do to worry so much about what women want and try to warp ourselves to be somebody we don´t want to be while different women want very different things anyway - some confidence would be better.
  8. What I want, and my understanding of what my female friends want is... Someone who loves me in a selfless way. Some guys say they "love" you or want you, but they just want to feel good by having you. It's different. And I want to love him back in the same way. I want someone who is healthy and happy in his own life, not a parasite who wants to leech off my happy vibes. I want a team mate on the journey of life - we help each other progress, we grow together, pick each other up when the other loses strength. Biggest turn off - depressed dudes who feel sorry for themselves. Biggest attraction - someone happy in their own skin and accomplishing things in life. And helping others on their journey. A true sign of inner strength.
  9. Hagbart C.

    Hagbart C. New Fapstronaut

    @Sweet: Thanks for great post, gives me some more hope.
    I would literally go on a journey with my future woman around the world and then have some hectar of (fruit)garden where we like it best. But right now I have to get over frustration being single and withdrawal from porn.
    Woman who truly wants a team mate for the journey of life and not for leeching off him financially or emotionally: :emoji_thumbsup:
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  10. GG2002

    GG2002 Fapstronaut

    I think problems ensue from any daters perspective when you judge an entire gender based on past experiences. Because what happens is you enter into dating any new people with the presumption that they are going to be a certain way and come across as angry and bitter. I’ve seen both men and women do this. It’s onlu hurting you. Because guess what?
    1. There are asexual and low libido men. A heck of a lot more than you can imagine as you don’t date men.
    2. Plenty of women with high libidos like men. I have a very high libido and like men. Maybe women with high libidos don’t like you or you have not yet encountered them, but that does not mean that high libido equals lesbian. I swear where do guys get this stuff?
    3. I’m not sure what a normal man is? Do you mean average looking? There are plenty of women seeking average men but the average or normal men don’t want average or normal women.
    And I agree with Jen if years and years pass and you struggle to meet someone the common denominator is usually you. Not just men but women. You pick the wrong people, you chase women who are not interested but ignore those that are.
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  11. peterprism

    peterprism New Fapstronaut

    A woman always need that the man should be loyal and he should tell truth always
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  12. Vulkan

    Vulkan Fapstronaut

    No, the opposite. I claim that different women want very different things.

    OK, maybe some of my statements were worded in a too provocative way, sorry for that. Maybe I sound somehow frustrated these days because I am on porn withdrawal (for example severe insomnia). But my statements are still based on studies, own experiences and observations and users in this thread wrench the meaning of my posts.

    Another example, I did not state that high libido women equals lesbian. I wrote about some percent of lesbian/bisexual women. The percentage in surveys varies a lot from country to country, so I guess because of stigma the numbers are often too low, but far from all high libido women = lesbian.
    And in fact I did encounter many high libido women (multiple times I was even asked for sex out of nowhere), another fals assumption from you. I just have trouble finding such a women plus good character for serious relationship.

    Yeah normal in terms of looks, not ugly and not a model. And no extreme charcacter, for example not that aggressive that he gets into trouble.

    A guy I knew told me he does not respect women, that ALL of them are whores - and he was insanely successful seducing them. So if you women here correlate the success with women with the character of men, then there is something wrong. And this is not even an extreme example, there are womanizers with much worse character. Online you see women state they are into good guys, but in reality you see masses of women fall for the overconfident jerks. Again, I don´t say ALL women are asexual, not hetero, into jerks or want to exploit men. Many of the "good" women are already in a serious relationship, but there´s hope as long as you manage to stay halfway sane and confident and don´t give a fuck about what women say they want (it only depresses you when you refine your character more and more while seeing them fall for jerks).
  13. GG2002

    GG2002 Fapstronaut

    Dating sucks for both genders trust me. You have to look for a very long time and deal with a lot of jerks to meet the right person. I think observations based on men on NoFap and their experiences with women would be a bit skewed and bitter. Instead it would be better to speak with healthy men and their experiences.

    And I hate to break it to you but very few ppl find the person who matches the libido they seek and the relationship characteristics. You have to compromise somewhere and here’s why. I have a high libido and I would love a man with a high libido who’s confident and masculine but also understanding kind, and faithful. What comes along with a man that is confident with a high libido? He often is also a cheater and because he’s masculine he wants me to sit at home and pop out kids. All I’m saying is that many of the characteristics we seek often have paired characteristics that suck. That’s why we have this conundrum. Men say I want a sexually open woman with a high libido. Okay but most women like that are aggressive, assertive, independent and unwilling to play a traditional feminine role. So she loves sex, but will outearn you and put you in your place. Or men who say they want women who seek providers but then are upset that they are being “used” for their money.

    And other men judge men’s attractiveness on their ability to get women but I don’t know a single woman that does. What you observe is confidence. And players have confidence that’s the attraction.
    Atlanticus, Jennica, JustinX and 2 others like this.
  14. meatsandwich

    meatsandwich Fapstronaut

    A guy here, as I don't want to be mixed here randomly and mistaken.

    1) I'm not confident
    2) I'm not successful
    3) Emotional
    4) Not funny at all

    Yet I found my love,
    so there isn't one type of women who just praise a macho man with high confidence.
    It might be from your life experiences which are similar and the similar mind, values that you share and even personality. Even with flaws, there is somebody for you, as nobody is perfect as love isn't about ''sex'' and it's more about support and understanding.

    I was even very depressed, but it has changed and that is through my relationships and she is my fiancée too.
    For me even if I can't make her laugh so much, I do my best that she always had her smile, as it matters to me more than anything in this world.
    Atlanticus, Jennica and Vulkan like this.
  15. jeremiah960

    jeremiah960 Fapstronaut

    How about a strong, confident leader...who believes in himself and has a life's purpose...takes care of himself physically and financially and makes a woman laugh, feel comfortable and safe? ( he also never lies, is transparent, genuine and congruent and listens really well...but has his own thoughts and opinions ) is going somewhere with his life and would like a partner/ lover and friend to go with him!....?
  16. TheSensoryStore

    TheSensoryStore New Fapstronaut

    A woman really doesn't want much from a man. There are really only seven things seven qualities that she's looking for in a life partner. Although these qualities are hard to find they are qualities of which every no man is capable.
    1-honesty. thesensorystore.co.uk/what-is-a-bubble-tube/
    4-blind loyalty.
    Atlanticus likes this.

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