Now you don't have pmo you're seeing clearer, actually can see your situation. Sounds like somehow you are uneasy with it...is there more to life than porn and video games? I'm not insulting you there but I've experienced similar. I now really feel starved where I live, socially and creatively. It used to seem ok when I could pmo but now I have a big drive to get out of here.
3/90 Went out for a few beers last night, I hardly drink and I felt pretty drunk. Only five bottles but two would have been plenty. I had been feeling really lonely yesterday so I went out to the bar/cafe. Met some people I know so that was nice to chat. This morning though felt wrecked and also very introspective. I feel so heightened with abstaining from pmo, like I could just start crying sometimes. I feel lonely a lot I realise, I'm pretty good at feeding myself and sleep and I rarely feel angry. Frustrated yes, sometimes. I am so looking forward to begin filling these huge gaps in my life, I guess I have started to. But I want to be overflowing with activities and friends and family. And a partner, life is definitely for sharing with somebody, someone special.
No brother, you are right. Before Nofap I was dead, and now I am alive again and feel ashamed from myself how I lived before. Before my life was only video games, PMO, and 2 sex experiences that were a failure for me. I didn't like to go outside. BUT Now it is completely the opposite, all my friends till now are not able to understand what happened and how I am a completely different guy so fast. When I finish the 90 days, I will write my story that will be very unique and I have a lot to tell. Now, Gym, go out with friends and girls, club, any activity outside home .... always. I am still in the beginning and I begin to see the huge difference. But I can tell now that PMO is like heroine if not worse. Till now no P for months, it is already dead. for M: 7 days than 1 relapse, 7 days then 1 relapse, 11 days then 1 relapse but now I will do it.
Why nobody answered that? Also why my day counter is one day less that my counting? And i need help of that severe dull aching pain that hits my nuts specially RT one from early morning....
I have been so lost. Detached, a bit down, anxiety. Not a good week at all! Old habits die hard hey? I need a reaffirm my commitment to this, otherwise I am going to keep putting it off and putting it off. Sounding like a broken record! Not the only area of my life with that problem. Right, starting right now, I will no longer look at porn or jack off to it. It is unhealthy, fucks up my mind and my brain and I use it as an excuse not to do anything else. It is not reality! Time to start living my true life. This is step one. Back in the game! Except it is not a game is it? It is real life. We don't get a second chance at it!
Man im in same boots Im very confused, keep postponing, not competitive like before, barely go to work, very anxious at people, losing my cognitive abilities........ Maybe dopamine deprivation is screaming loud but i keep ignoring.... Nobody likes treatment but we must take it.........
You know all the bad things happening, still you need any other reason to stop this habit. Guys just be practical, You all knows what happens if you relapse. The only treatment for you is your decision. If you decide once, that's it you must follow it. That's the only treatment for you.
