Mission failure and I require a Reboot

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by JermJerm123, Jul 6, 2017.

  1. JermJerm123

    JermJerm123 Fapstronaut

    Hey y'all My name is Jeremiah and I am 17 years old with a masterbation addiction. where do I even begin? Well for one I have know about this site for over a year. The last time I even posted something on here was either January or February 2016. So yes it has been a long time! Ok so I stopped Masterbating on December 21, 2015. I went the entire year of 2016 without even jacking off. Well 2017 hit and things change. 2017 has been fun and amazing year so far except for one thing. In early March of this year I all of a sudden just snapped and started to fap again! I made it to 1 year and 3 months and I wish I stopped myself that day! I could of gone 2 two years! So I do have a addiction to masterbation but not porn. Personally I don't watch it and just stay away from it. I have it blocked on my wifi so I don't get on it. I am just really addicted to masterbation. Yes it is ok in my opinion every now and then to go ahead and do it but when it gets out of control it needs to be stopped! Since March I have be out of control! From the moment I done it back in March I have just been super upset, sad depressed and feel really guilty about it! It has effect my life so much I have no clue what to do! To make matters worse being out in public is by far the hardest! Why? Cuz now a day girls out there showing of their ass by wearing leggings/yoga pants were you can see the out line of there ass and pussy! It is so damn hard not to look and go home and Jack off! It has gotten so bad I even go on Facebook or Instagram to look up a cute girl and Jack off to their photos! During the school year it is absolutely the worst! It's like sex is cramed in your face! Non stop! It's World War Sex! People talking about how they just had sex with whoever. Girls propping up their boobs and showing off their ass with super tight yoga pants! Bruh I have saw a few girls even go as far as to buy leggings that don't even fit and the squeeze there ass in it! This stretches out the fabric making it basically transparent, seeing their panties/thongs! They don't even get freaking dress coded or anything! It's like they want me to go home find them on social media and Jack off! It is pure torture torture! Well it is summer vacation for me and I just have way more time on my hands then I did during the school year. What have I been doing with that time? Jacking off! Ya of course I work and I do have hobbies but most of my time has gone from work/study/hobbies to let's just fucking waste time and beat the absolute living shit out of my dick! Every time I do I feel horrible! Well all that to say I did it again today and I am so sick and tired of it! I want to go back to being normal and Happy! I really like to have masterbated last on a Monday because it gives me something to look forward to every Monday. Meaning hey it is Monday it has been a week since I did it. Or it has been 1 month or whatever. Rewarding myself with a treat and stating of the week on a positive note. It makes me look forward to Mondays and the upcoming week head and gives me some Monday motivation. But I am so freaking done I don't care what day of the week it is I just want to stop! Thursday July 6, 2017 I jacked off again and hope it will be the last for a while! Sorry I wrote an essay but I need to help! Please help me and give me encourage to keep going! I barely get past 3 weeks without jacking off and my short term goal is to get past 1 month. Once I get past 1 month I know I can get past my long term goal. 2 years! The first month is always the hardest! I need help! Thank you so much for reading and helping! It means the world to me!

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