Hey bro, Don’t worry too much about your thoughts. What matters is which thoughts you choose to act on. That’s the measure of a man. Do some wholesome stuff for yourself, like talk to your grandparents or an elderly person, or help someone cross the street, or give up your seat for someone on the bus, whatever it is just do something nice for another person and you’ll start feeling better (Coming from somebody who has experience with OCD and pretty disturbing intrusive thoughts.) Appreciate your honesty on here, checking in with us and wanting to grow. Wishing you blessings brother.