Escort challenge

Discussion in 'Problematic Sexual Behavior' started by need4realchg, Nov 14, 2019.

Are you struggling with paid-sex?

  1. Yes— and I would join the challenge/group

    8 vote(s)
    42.1%
  2. No, but I would like to join too

    6 vote(s)
    31.6%
  3. Yes— but not interested in a challenge or a group

    5 vote(s)
    26.3%
  1. need4realchg

    need4realchg Fapstronaut

    For sex addicts addicted to the convenience of paid sex— would you be interested in a “no-paid-sex challenge?”

    I’m interested to hear first from those who use sex as their primary drug —- (not porn addicts).

    i am asking who would like to face it together?
     
    Last edited: Nov 14, 2019
  2. WilBil99

    WilBil99 Fapstronaut

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    Hey I’m still up for dealing w this issue as a team vs my sorry self who can’t seem to make better decisions when it comes to massage parlors. If anyone is looking to support or for support count me in. Thanks all!
     
  3. need4realchg

    need4realchg Fapstronaut

    Sounds good. Maybe we can make a challenge or group if we get say 5 or so interested?
     
    Anubis Rises, Veritech and WilBil99 like this.
  4. Veritech

    Veritech Fapstronaut

    I'm in.

    Hopefully this challenge will help us move beyond the fallacy that escorts are better than porn because the experience is real sex with a real woman.
     
  5. WilBil99

    WilBil99 Fapstronaut

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    OK @need4realchg and @Veritech sounds like we may be in the same boat and before it becomes the Titanic, let’s support each other, hold each other accountable and learn from each other. I started nofap in May after a PMO bender at work (field office, no one ever there which was too much opportunity for me). Haven’t viewed P since and MO maybe 5 times BUT I’ve let the ladies at the AMPs take it from there. I’ve been 8 times since July. It’s more about the search and scouting that Consumes me, the thrill of it. Like you guys I believe, I have wife and kids and need to cut the crap. Thanks
     
  6. GA93JDeereboy

    GA93JDeereboy Fapstronaut

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    I’ll join. It’s nice I found this thread. thanks need4reach!!!
    I am up for beating this. I know escorts don’t compare to the real thing. Unfortunately I haven’t had the real real thing hardly. And just paying, you won’t get to experience what it’s actually like to be with a woman.
     
  7. Veritech

    Veritech Fapstronaut

    I'll start.

    I've been using porn since my late teens. As a teenager, I truly felt that I would never get laid or no girl would ever want to be with me. Spent lots of time using the VHS to rent porn videos and would sneak to the basement to watch. Later in grad school, I had my own place, so I did not need to seek the porn from the video store. After grad school, I would sit down in the filthy booths at the adult store.

    I started a serious relationship and I am married. I have three kids. I cannot complain about my sex life. My wife is intelligent and sexy. However with smartphones and streaming porn, I could not escape the grasp of being able to watch and jerk off at whim. First with paid streaming then with free tube sites.

    For sake of interest, I decided to try an escort service. It was an incall girl friend experience. I have mostly been using this same service, often trying different escorts, although I have repeated with a few.

    I have probably spent thousands of dollars on porn and escorts. I want to stop.

    I want to stop living a double life. I want to be a real man, husband and father.
     
  8. GA93JDeereboy

    GA93JDeereboy Fapstronaut

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    So where we at 4 now? So after 5 you guys want to do a group thing?

    I’m in the US, travel a bit around here.
     
  9. greaterloves

    greaterloves Fapstronaut

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    Hey Guys,

    Kudos to all of you for sharing and desiring to kick this. I'm right there with you, have successfully abstained from P/M for the last couple months but massage parlors are still incredibly appealing to me. Haven't been to one in a little while, but have been googling them more frequently lately, and the desire feels overwhelming. I also have a wife, trying for kids, and don't want this to rule my life anymore.

    Would be happy to set up a group chat for those of us who want some more accountability.
     
  10. Homelander

    Homelander Fapstronaut

    Count me in bro!

    Although I have a woman I can reach out to for weekly love and sex, I still am haunted with escort memories flashing in my mind.
     
  11. WilBil99

    WilBil99 Fapstronaut

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    I thought quitting p would lead me to more freedom and it did. Haven’t looked at it since May. The time and energy I wasted was tremendous and once I went PMO free, it was like finally living a real life. Being able to leave my phone open for kids or wife to pick up and view was liberating. Now I find myself reviewing AMPs online for pricing and services offered. Doing research just like back in PMO days. I can’t trade one addiction for another. My wife and I had a sex drought for about 18 months, young kids, her father passed away, life in general. We got to a better place after I started nofap and we are good for about once a week now. Monday through Wednesday are my toughest days. I won’t act out after Wed because I want to enjoy the weekend sex that will be coming so I “save up”. She is staying an extra day over holidays with her family and I asked if kids could come home with me because as soon as I found out they were staying another day, I was researching a new establishment to visit. Maybe a little growth? Guilt? Regardless, I need to get in touch with the guy who started this journey and correct the course before my next wrong turn is my last. I need to set a goal, short term goal to get me to Thanksgiving, who’s in?
     
    need4realchg likes this.
  12. need4realchg

    need4realchg Fapstronaut

    I am with you. What is amp?
     
  13. WilBil99

    WilBil99 Fapstronaut

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    Great! Asian massage parlors. What’s your battle?
     
    need4realchg likes this.
  14. need4realchg

    need4realchg Fapstronaut

    Ahhh Asian massage parlors ! Gotcha!

    I have done the latina massage parlor before—- but it’s never limited to hand jobs. Full service.

    I have done normal massages and those are always Asian chicks who easily like to touch me I can say but it’s all business.

    I have overcome stripclubs and escorts; mostly by focusing on planing my time and tracking the costs and sharing with my AP and

    I still struggle with prostitutes, and brothels presently.
     
    WilBil99 likes this.
  15. WilBil99

    WilBil99 Fapstronaut

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    Wondering if anyone’s activities magnified after giving up porn or MO? I never thought of massage parlors while viewing P but once I went PMO free, it seemed to open a new can of worms. I can do Without (or at least have) porn but was I better off jerking off than visiting massage parlors? I’m wondering about the all or nothing approach. Am I just looking for a hall pass to jerk off?
     
    need4realchg likes this.
  16. Homelander

    Homelander Fapstronaut

    I never visited a massage parlor, because I did not want to spend so much money on just a hand-job.
    Dirty me would rather spend 50 bucks having full blown sex with an escort for 30min.

    However, I would not mind burning some money for a first-time nuru massage.
    This has heen one of my fetishes for a long time, but looking how expensive this is I would be better off
    asking my girlfriend to give me a nuru massage in her bathroom.
     
    WilBil99 and need4realchg like this.
  17. need4realchg

    need4realchg Fapstronaut

    I don’t know if there’s a correlation between giving up porn directly and sex addict activity— but I have had binges with escorts that mirror what would have been binges in porn. They aren’t as frequent thankfully but when it’s cheap— and my emotional compass is spinning dangerously it’s very possible. I’m trying to get back to scheduling my time to resolve.
     
    WilBil99 and Homelander like this.
  18. SteveIsMyName

    SteveIsMyName Fapstronaut

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    This is my experience. Don't view escort/massage ads....don't frequent them, either. The goal is REAL SEX with a normal partner, unpaid. It takes time, but things worth it always take time.

    Stay the path my friend. I've been there; am there and will once again put this all behind me. Short term pleasure is not worth long term destruction.

    Invest in yourself and check in here often.
     
  19. WilBil99

    WilBil99 Fapstronaut

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    Invest in yourself and check in hereoften.

    Great advice. I don’t think I’ve ever invested in myself.
     
    need4realchg likes this.
  20. Veritech

    Veritech Fapstronaut

    I have the opposite reaction.

    While waiting in my car before getting the escort hotel room number, I watch porn.

    After my time with the escort abruptly comes to an end, I end up watching porn.

    I have to reset my NoFap counter; might as well binge on more porn.
     
    need4realchg and WilBil99 like this.

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