900 Days of No PMO

Friends, peace,

This is the 10th consecutive 90 day streak, & for this, I am grateful.

I am, however, late in the posting (seems usual enough). I have been busy (again, another common trend)--but I have profited much from my own writings. Even if my writings end up poor & bare, it has been useful to revisit the last 90 days' time.

As usual, here are some links to add context to my journey:

My Journal
90 Days of No PMO Success Story
180 Days of No PMO Success Story
365 Days of No PMO Success Story
450 Days of No PMO Success Story
540 Days of No PMO Success Story
630 Days of No PMO Success Story
720 Days of No PMO Success Story
810 Days of No PMO Success Story

What did I notice revisiting my last 90 Days?...I will try to write my best. As it stands, I am not too energetic today, but I wish to write this down for my own benefit (& hopefully for someone else's benefit in the forum).

After reviewing the last 90 days, I was actually somewhat surprised.

As compared to some of my last success stories, I found that I had a lot more intense struggles with temptations (as regards SSA & fetish). It was actually something quite annoying to see--because I did not remember it being that way. And yet, by & by, the trials were consistent. I did not write down all of the times, so this is just guessing (I skimmed the last 90 Days)...but I would not be surprised if I had difficulties once every two weeks on average--quite possibly, on average, every week...

That said, there were some added stressors. The main one seemed to be the increase of annoyances between me & my roommate. This clearly had its own effect on me--namely, a lack of some taken-for-granted peace & even a reduction in rest.

There were also a few other striking notes that set this time apart:

-I finished two books & began another.
-At a few low points, I was able to focus & likewise have simultaneous high points. These were often during times of prayer & after deep reflection & focus on the current situation (in other words, not "going through the motions").
-On the note of prayer: These were similar in duration to the last success story. I still wish to make more time for it, as of old. I feel too rushed still...
-The weather increased in heat...with a marked simultaneous decrease in general apparel...Coincidence...I think not! Alas!...
-I had time off! This was both restful & difficult (which tends to be the case).
-I had more random "events" break up my schedule--including a longer volunteer assignment.
-Possibly had a more solid workout pattern
-There were likely some successes at work that I should be more thankful for.

So, despite my negativity, I think that there was a lot of good in the last 90 days. Life has its ups & downs...& I am still on the road, as it were. Despite the increase in temptations this round through, the time seemed markedly similar to last. In some ways, a lot of things are becoming repetitious & stale. This can be a trial in itself--indeed, it is one that I am still grappling with.

Success does not happen overnight...& I am still learning this, even now!

As usual, please do not hesitate to ask questions &c.

Thanks,
God bless,
A Modern Miroku