810 Days of No PMO

AModernMiroku

AModernMiroku

Fapstronaut
Friends, peace,

This is the 9th consecutive 90 day streak, & for this, I am grateful.

I am, however, late in the posting. I have been busy--but I have profited much from my own writings. Even if my writings end up poor & bare, it has been useful to revisit the last 90 days' time.

As usual, here are some links to add context to my journey:

My Journal
90 Days of No PMO Success Story
180 Days of No PMO Success Story
365 Days of No PMO Success Story
450 Days of No PMO Success Story
540 Days of No PMO Success Story
630 Days of No PMO Success Story
720 Days of No PMO Success Story

What did I notice revisiting my last 90 Days?...

-I continued the very positive trend from my last Success Story; namely, there was a marked increase in stability. I admit, looking back, I had more occasions of intense temptations than I remembered. Before looking back on this time-frame, I thought that I might have had only 1 or 2 serious temptations to older ways. Not so. I had, perhaps, 5 (give or take) strenuous & passionate temptations. That said: these were shorter lived & more bearable than what might have been in the past, for one reason or another.

-This time-frame marked a decline in nocturnal emissions. In skimming my entries, I did not notice any on record (which is strange--for I have ordinarily seen an increase overall since starting this particular no PMO streak). That said, to be blunt, there was release via waste.

-This marked a special record for me. I surpassed my previously longest streak. I finally trekked into the two-year mark! It is unreal, but this is a great thing. Healing is possible.

-I had a general period of fatigue, lack of sleep, & intense work & study. This also meant a lack of leisure. This period was notably dry & repetitive. My prayers were also shortened as a result, by & by, which was a great source of discouragement.

-I passed another major exam (which was a source of great stress &c.).

-I more-or-less started & finished two books. This seemed slow for me--but it is nice to see this kind of progress, especially in the midst of the above difficulties.

I have already spent much too long re-reading my older posts & writing this fairly inadequate, newer post. I know well that there is much more to say--but I suppose this ought to do for now.

In short: it was a dry season of my life, but the winter is tending towards a (perhaps) fresh springtime...

As usual, please do not hesitate to ask questions &c.

Thanks,
God bless,
A Modern Miroku
 
@Mr.Tony & @Redemptionisrequired : Thank you both for your kind words! It always means a lot!

@bronzemind : Experience is a good teacher in this. I try to be attentive & make changes accordingly. I cannot say I have done the best in this...but I am always trying. I have no concrete plans besides my usual items. I try to maintain a schedule, maintain prayer, practice discipline, & learn from my successes & mistakes--as I am doing presently via writing.

I think that I simply need to focus on my prayer & sleep schedules with greater attention. These are singular boons to my days.

...but the next streak will, of course, have its own trials & tribulations. Not everything can be predicted...& what I do know...will be hard! I certainly need to resume my studies. Work will become, again, a monster...so handling that will be part of what lies ahead...

Thanks for stopping by.

To all, as usual,
God bless,
AMM
 
AModernMiroku said:
Friends, peace,

This is the 9th consecutive 90 day streak, & for this, I am grateful.

I am, however, late in the posting. I have been busy--but I have profited much from my own writings. Even if my writings end up poor & bare, it has been useful to revisit the last 90 days' time.

As usual, here are some links to add context to my journey:

My Journal
90 Days of No PMO Success Story
180 Days of No PMO Success Story
365 Days of No PMO Success Story
450 Days of No PMO Success Story
540 Days of No PMO Success Story
630 Days of No PMO Success Story
720 Days of No PMO Success Story

What did I notice revisiting my last 90 Days?...

-I continued the very positive trend from my last Success Story; namely, there was a marked increase in stability. I admit, looking back, I had more occasions of intense temptations than I remembered. Before looking back on this time-frame, I thought that I might have had only 1 or 2 serious temptations to older ways. Not so. I had, perhaps, 5 (give or take) strenuous & passionate temptations. That said: these were shorter lived & more bearable than what might have been in the past, for one reason or another.

-This time-frame marked a decline in nocturnal emissions. In skimming my entries, I did not notice any on record (which is strange--for I have ordinarily seen an increase overall since starting this particular no PMO streak). That said, to be blunt, there was release via waste.

-This marked a special record for me. I surpassed my previously longest streak. I finally trekked into the two-year mark! It is unreal, but this is a great thing. Healing is possible.

-I had a general period of fatigue, lack of sleep, & intense work & study. This also meant a lack of leisure. This period was notably dry & repetitive. My prayers were also shortened as a result, by & by, which was a great source of discouragement.

-I passed another major exam (which was a source of great stress &c.).

-I more-or-less started & finished two books. This seemed slow for me--but it is nice to see this kind of progress, especially in the midst of the above difficulties.

I have already spent much too long re-reading my older posts & writing this fairly inadequate, newer post. I know well that there is much more to say--but I suppose this ought to do for now.

In short: it was a dry season of my life, but the winter is tending towards a (perhaps) fresh springtime...

As usual, please do not hesitate to ask questions &c.

Thanks,
God bless,
A Modern Miroku
Click to expand...
Your story truly inspires me. Especially since I have recently relapsed after a streak of more than 2 years. It is very motivating to see that it is still possible to get back to that mark after this relapse. I felt really hopeless after ending the streak and then binging but now I am very hopeful. If you did it, I can do it too.

I also noticed a common pattern in your and mine life which is the stress or anxiety associated with wasting time. not working enough or not studying enough. I love how you say you have to achieve much more in life but at the same time you are happy with the present. I will apply that in my life in order to get myself free of the anxiety which can be a trigger. I will just convince my self that no matter how little I studied , it is good enough.

I am taking all the necessary steps right now to keep myself safe and I hope to be back at that two year mark someday which feels so hard right now. Once I get there I will never ever make this mistake again of just watching one glimpse of P.

Keep sharing your experiences brother!
 
@theforgotten1423 : I am glad that this entry inspired you. From the looks of it, you read some of the preceding entries, too.

I am glad that you got that bit of context as well. This whole thing was not accomplished in one moment!

Healing is indeed possible.

And I think it is more-so at the ready for yourself. You have made a good streak, it seems. Those times are not wasted in the slightest.

When I compare one of my first long streaks (which was near two years) to the present one (which has since exceeded two years), I note that the first one was not as clean as the second--& it also trained me for the second streak.

It is all to say that everything adds up, & even the failures can be leveraged for success (even if not ideal).

I wish you well.

God bless,
AMM
 
AModernMiroku said:
@theforgotten1423 : I am glad that this entry inspired you. From the looks of it, you read some of the preceding entries, too.

I am glad that you got that bit of context as well. This whole thing was not accomplished in one moment!

Healing is indeed possible.

And I think it is more-so at the ready for yourself. You have made a good streak, it seems. Those times are not wasted in the slightest.

When I compare one of my first long streaks (which was near two years) to the present one (which has since exceeded two years), I note that the first one was not as clean as the second--& it also trained me for the second streak.

It is all to say that everything adds up, & even the failures can be leveraged for success (even if not ideal).

I wish you well.

God bless,
AMM
Click to expand...
You really hit the mark with "my first streak wasn't as clean as this one". I believe that is also what led me towards this eventual relapse as I did not stay totally clean. This time I'll try to make it as clean as possible because small steps in the wrong direction keep getting bigger till they eventually become a relapse.
 
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